glacius: (Take a body to tundra.)
Glacius ([personal profile] glacius) wrote in [community profile] hadriel_logs2016-12-04 03:54 pm

You can recover.

Who: Glacius and whoever; open and closed starters within.
What: After a couple of weeks of mourning and attempting to heal, Glacius attempts to reintegrate into life in the city.
Where: Various locations-- Guard headquarters, Emily's shop, Glacius' apartment
When: 12/4, 12/8
Warnings: Talk of physical/emotional trauma.

City Streets OR Guard Headquarters - OPEN
It had been some time since a demon had possessed Emily, and Glacius had not been faring well since. The violent act that he'd been forced to commit to end that conflict--plus the scarring that had resulted from his injuries, a permanent reminder of his failure to his friends-- meant that he'd spent every day since in a wavering state of emotional and physical stability. He'd always been a reclusive creature, but now he rarely ventured outside of his apartment... and if he did it was almost always at odd hours of the night, when he was sure most people would have already retired. It wasn't as if he had been sleeping well as of late.

The only thing keeping him from sinking completely into the mire of his depression were the daily visits by Carlisle, who saw to the alien's wounds and helped him grapple with his demons when it was needed. Little by little, the alien had been taking heart from the clergyman's unwavering support... and he knew that eventually, he was going to have to start putting his life back together. He still had a duty to the guard, and to his friends... though how many of them would even consider themselves that after hearing of what had done, he wasn't sure. He would have to find out at some point, but right now all he felt capable of doing as slowly edging himself back into his duties and familiar old routines.

That meant that today, at the crack of dawn, the alien was up--and after donning the partial set of armor he now possessed in order to cover the worst of his scarring, headed out to resume his patrols. After that he spent most of the day at the Guard's headquarters, doing his best to catch up on on paperwork and reports that had piled up in his absence. That sort of busywork proved a suitable distraction for the alien at least, giving him something concrete to fixate on instead of his own worries. He double checked and then triple-checked his work, then spent time making sure everything was neatly filed and organized. He spent some time cleaning up the desk he'd been assigned and then, finding himself still wanting for things to do, read through the reports of other members--even going so far as to fill in where he could or re-organize the ones that clearly didn't have any effort put into them. The whole time he worked quietly, expression still masked behind his alien helmet, only engaging in conversation when he was approached--and even then it was more clipped than he usually was. At least they weren't in the middle of the gods' games--it meant that the office was fairly quiet, and very few people came or went.

Emily's Lakeside Shop- CLOSED to Emily
Eventually Glacius exhausted everything he could possibly do, and at that point he decided to head back to his apartment... he was weary anyways from his poor sleep, and it meant that his personal troubles caught up to him easier. The odd light of the cave was waning as he crossed the bridge that would take him back to Spire Two, where he currently resided... but just beyond that sat the shewing shop where he knew one of his friends worked, and the alien found himself frozen in place as he stared at the establishment in the distance, thinking of her. A part of him longed to reconnect to Emily, knew that a good friend probably would have gone to see her by now, to make sure she was holding up alright... but the last time she had been through something this cave had put her through, she hadn't wanted to talk to him about it. He could imagine she would want that even less now, given that he had a direct hand in her fate. She was probably better off without him, in all honesty.

... And yet nonetheless, he couldn't resist the urge to at least see if she was there. He didn't have to engage her, he told himself--he could just look in one of the windows, and make sure that she had been brought back, that she was alive and well. Glacius crept quietly towards the sewing shop, but when he was actually its grounds he found himself frozen again. The powerful mixture of emotions he'd felt earlier was roiling around himself full-force now... he wasn't sure how long he stood there staring, but he knew he'd fucked up when the door to the shop opened suddenly and warm light spilled out from inside the building to cut through the falling darkness--illuminating not only the path, but the armor-clad ice alien standing in it, immobilized by his uncertainty.

Glacius' Apartment, forward-dated to the 8th- CLOSED to Carlisle
It had been two weeks since the disastrous events that had sent Glacius into a downward spiral, and just a few days since the alien had begun trying to put his life back together. He'd managed to slide back into his old duties fairly seamlessly thanks to the distractions and sense of purpose they provided--though being seen by others was still somewhat difficult for him, thanks to lingering self-doubts and self-consciousness due to his scars, which he was still trying to keep concealed from most people. He'd at least managed to reconnect with those closest to him, and that had done a lot to make him feel like a person again, not just a monster hiding himself away completely for fear of what people might think of him.

And there was one person in particular that he had become close to, whose intervention and support had enabled the ice alien to even make these strides in the first place. Tonight Glacius wanted to make an active effort to show his appreciation for Carlisle's ceaseless efforts. He departed from the City Guard's headquarters a little bit earlier than usual so that he could stop by the shops and the bar for food and drink, respectively. Then he was back at his apartment, trying to have everything set up by the time the clergyman usually came by to check on him, and see how his injuries were healing. Looking over the spread he'd set out over a low table in the main room of his apartment, Glacius became acutely aware that he'd never made a gesture like this for a human before. There was a high chance he was going to fuck it up, and that nervousness was gnawing at his guts as he waited for his friend to show up... but if he could manage to show his appreciation for everything that Carlisle had done for him, and give him one night in which he could relax instead of worrying over him and whatever else he might currently be going through, then that would be worth it.

In the meantime the otherworldly being busied himself trying to clean up some of the lingering blood stains in his apartment, working distractedly until he was startled from his task that tell-tale knocking at his door.
circumitus: I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised. (so you threw a sword at me last night)

Guard HQ

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-05 04:30 am (UTC)(link)
It's been a routine. Something Rey has always needed. Having a routine gives her a plan, a goal to walk towards. Even if all it is is walking. That's what patrolling is, really. Walking. Very rarely has she encountered anything noteworthy, and even when there is she can't bring herself to waste her time scrawling words on a paper to report. She is no Chairborne Ranger, as her peers would have so 'affectionately' call it.

Was everything she remembered of such people even real? She can't help but wonder sometimes, in the muddled mess of memories inside her head. It hurts when she tries to dig in too deep, and can be difficult to pull herself out of. Bring her mind back to the present. It isn't until recent that she has been able to maintain such a state without going postal.

She won't let it happen again. Not now, not ever, no matter how unraveled her head might become. It had been easier not to think about her situation back home on most days, but now it consumes her. Heckles her in her sleep, and taunts her when she's awake. And all she can hear is the voice of that same synthetic woman who had infested this place with her disease. Who goaded Nick, and hurt Muscovy.

Her voice, that laugh, which drives into Rey's skull like knives...

'I have always wondered what defines you. The great divide between human and synthetic ends with you, doesn't it? And it just occurred to me... It isn't your memories, or the many fiends that live in your head.

'No...'


The door slams behind her, harder than it should.

'It is your BEATING HEART!'

Rey jolts, not sure at what point did her feet end up taking her back to the Guard's headquarters. But she's here.

This isn't the first time she has mindlessly wandered into places with no conscious reasoning. It is, however, the first time that she lands herself back in this place with someone already present.

"Ah, apologies." Rey shifts, as if sidestepping a sudden attack that no one can see. She falls quiet, neither moving forward nor retreating.

It isn't until she sees Glacius then that she recalls meeting the other ice alien, similar in appearance, but different in name and temperament. The only reason she hadn't come running to him afterwards was...

Well. She had distractions, to say the least.

"Not going to be here long. Just, um. Papers. Yes."

Rey isn't often one to bumble. But then, she doesn't look particularly like herself, either; pale-faced and darkened eyes. She might as well be a shuffling corpse of the woman Glacius had met previously.
circumitus: I ONLY KNOW HOLA. (EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH)

i've had a hankering for some glacius. <3

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-06 03:33 pm (UTC)(link)
At first she only blinks, as if trying to make sense out of his words. And maybe part of her is. It's been difficult to figure out the occasional jumble of sentences in between the bouts of sleep deprivation she's suffered these last few weeks. Some days are just easier than others.

While Rey herself might look like hell, seeing Glacius right now, she feels that one could very well say the same thing for him, too. She hasn't lingered around HQ enough to know the full details of every event that transpired when demons were about, but it doesn't come as surprise that anyone would be a little worse for wear in the aftermath of such things.

Not like she is one to talk, anyway.

"No. No, that's all right." She shakes her head, her growing bangs whipping over her darkened eyes annoyingly. "Just, um. Didn't realize that you worked here, too."
circumitus: Legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense. (we walked 2 miles)

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-08 02:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Stepping closer into the room, Rey folds her arms over her chest as she gives Glacius another once over. She hasn't seen much of him, but he does appear to have seen better days himself.

"Am sure that the sentiment is appreciated, but you don't have to worry about whether or not you're being 'useful' to anyone if you've been through some shit. Think we've all -- or at least most of us -- have been there."

Hell. Rey sure as shit knows she has.
circumitus: I ONLY KNOW HOLA. (EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH)

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-12 03:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Yet another sentiment that Rey can all too relate to. "Understood. 'Idle hands are the devil's workshop', as they say."

Though Glacius might not be as familiar with that idiom as some people she knows. Oops.

"Said no such thing, actually." She raises a brow. "Wasn't really intending to come here, to be perfectly honest. Haven't been paying much attention to direction lately."

Not as bad as, say, when Confusion was throwing everyone in for a literal loop. But it's still worrisome.
circumitus: She literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me. (tomorrow never knows)

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-13 03:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Rey hesitates to say anything, even a word. The muscles in her arms tighten as her eyes are drawn to the space at her feet, before looking to Glacius. He seems like he's seen better days as well.

"It's... complicated. You've probably got other problems to worry about."

Easier to dismiss the issue than to admit there is an issue to begin with.
circumitus: I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month. (i need an office)

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-15 04:20 am (UTC)(link)
Even Rey has to admit, Glacius makes a indisputable point. The most seemingly happiest person here would find something to be miserable about later down the line. That's just the way of things -- and how life as she knows it works.

Though Glacius offers not to stick his nose in her business, Rey moves closer to where he sits. Putting a more conversational distance between them when she opts to grab a chair and take a seat herself. It isn't until she does that the full weight of her exhaustion settles into her nerves, her muscles, and she can't help but feel relieved to finally be off her feet.

"It was a few weeks back, when Hope and Delight were messing with the Door," she begins, grimacing. "Someone from home came here for a few days. Was aware that she was here, but didn't... look hard enough for her. Should have. Didn't."
circumitus: 'Cause it makes him feel like a fish. (says he likes to get high and swim)

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-16 11:36 pm (UTC)(link)
One could argue how much trouble was really caused. By Rey's standards, IV's intrusion was pretty minuscule. No one died, at least, as she had received the brunt end of two incidents that Rey is aware of.

What the synthetic woman did was something arguably worse. She stuck her fingers into a pie that wasn't hers and didn't even bother to eat the damn thing. And that was enough.

"That depends on your definition of 'trouble', but she did cause some unrest. Even hurt someone, but not too bad. She isn't the type to leave her mark through brute force."
circumitus: I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised. (so you threw a sword at me last night)

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-26 04:28 pm (UTC)(link)
The description proves to be a reminder, as Rey's brows lift slightly.

"Another alien, right? Looked like you, but was on the greener, more pissed off side?" She leans back in her seat, hands falling onto her lap. The darkness under her eyes becomes more prominent when she gapes a little, now less on the tired squinty side. "Might have run into him, too."
circumitus: Keep up the good work. (it's a 12/12/12 miracle)

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-28 01:37 am (UTC)(link)
"Well, he acted like we knew each other. Never met him before, though he wouldn't be the first one to give that impression. Carlisle, Muscovy, and some other girl all were the same way when we first met."

Rey realizes then that she never did ask for a name. Not even when she had contacted Carlisle after the aforementioned girl had claimed that he had made at attempt on the life of the other Rey he knew. The one he felt indebted to 'make amends' to.
circumitus: There's my chippy! (where's my chippy?)

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-29 04:28 am (UTC)(link)
If it's anyone who can commiserate over having no memory of people who act like they know you, it's Rey. Even before multiverses came along and complicated things, having her memories frequently wiped and rewritten for nearly a century has a way of making certain reunions... awkward.

She glances downward at the desk, her fingers folding together over her lap. She takes a moment to think, to take it all in before she decides to answer. Because she can also understand just how much of a touchy subject this can be.

"They mentioned that we met on some sort of colony ship, in space." It still seems like too much bullshit to take in, but with four parties having come from the same place that she knows of so far, the answer is hard to deny. "Can't say much for him, since we didn't talk for very long. He had a very different temperament from you, will tell you that much. Has it been long since you met another one of your kind?"
circumitus: This is drunk and confused... (this is worse than naked and afraid)

[personal profile] circumitus 2016-12-30 03:55 am (UTC)(link)
Coming from a reality where a virtually all-seeing AI had already snuck into an orbital satellite network, preventing any space travel efforts in the past, it's a concept that seems all too old and forgotten. But then, the concept of being in an underground city ruled by powerful godlike entities is far more improbable than the former.

Rey notices Glacius flinch, and immediately regrets her query. Maybe she had no place in prying. It isn't like she has a very positive outlook on those that are like herself, considering that there is no other synthetic quite like Rey. Not even her brother could understand how and why she is what she is.

Her eyes dart away, mouth tightening into a thin line.

"Am familiar with what it's like, being held accountable for someone else's actions. Not only with these people who knew me from that ship, but used to be different people as well. Now they're all just ghosts, living in memory. Up here," she says, lifting one hand and pointing to the side of her head, eyes still drawn downward.
circumitus: There's my chippy! (where's my chippy?)

[personal profile] circumitus 2017-01-03 03:33 am (UTC)(link)
True, not many people could relate. But she waves off Glacius' apology nevertheless. "Don't be sorry. Wouldn't wish this sort of thing on anyone."

In a way, there is comfort in knowing that most people don't know what it's like. After all, it isn't as if she can say she's 'lonely' when she has the minds of others in her brain. Though that still isn't the same as the companionship of a physical being.

"Hell. Am not always sure who I am," Rey admits. "Hard to tell some days, when people want you to be one thing but there's always a part that tries tugging in a different direction."
circumitus: I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised. (so you threw a sword at me last night)

[personal profile] circumitus 2017-01-08 02:54 am (UTC)(link)
Although Rey really shouldn't be terribly shocked by what Glacius says, she can't help but just blink at him for a moment.

...

"Did you--" She lifts her hand, gesticulating at him. "--really basically just say to 'follow your heart'?"

Because she doesn't know whether to laugh or gawk. It's so contrite and yet so genuine, though!

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