He wants to look away, but he doesn't. He needs Ronan to understand, to believe him, and he also has no desire to ever talk about this again if he can avoid it. He hasn't told anyone. Not a soul. He doesn't want to be telling Ronan this now, but - he needs to. He needs to have it out there, so Ronan, at least, can understand why Adam so desperately didn't want Gansey to know.

"Do you remember the tree, in Cabeswater? The one you wouldn't go in? I saw a vision in there. I saw Gansey, dead, and it was my fault -"

And Ronan hated him for it, Ronan knew it was all his fault and he rightfully hated Adam because of it. He takes a breath, steadies himself, though his voice is still tight and full of stress.

"But if it's my fault, that means I can stop it. That means his name on the list doesn't mean anything, because I'm not going to allow him to come to harm, especially not because of me. I would never do that. Never."