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hadriel_logs2017-03-29 10:27 am
fracturedbeauty) wrote in hadriel_logs2017-03-29 10:27 am
Entry tags:
Time - It's Eating Me Alive, Unable To Rewind.
Who: Yukari and You (OTA on Side A)
What: Yukari's desperation during the Separation Event
Where: All around Side A
When: 3/28 through 4/09
Warnings: Violence, will update as needed.
[A] The First Few Hours
Yukari happened to be wandering around when the Cave divided. Seeing the wall shoot up to separate both sides makes the hair stand up on the back of his neck and he instantly reaches for his phone. Desperately he tries to call and text, but there's nothing. The reception seems to be completely out.
Without a moment's hesitation, he starts searching all around Side A, looking for someone at a very brisk pace. He's trying to keep his face stern as he tells himself not to worry, but it might glimmer into the true panic he feels from time to time as he continues to search.
When the search seems to be fruitless, he scrambles back to the wall. Looking for any weaknesses along it. And when that also fails, he unsheathes his sword and starts attacking the wall. He slashes away at it, coursing Green Electricity against it from time to time until he wears himself down and drops to his knees beside the wall.
Sweat drips from his brow as he grips at the wall with a hand. Why? Good God... "Why!?" he yells out, clenching his hand into a fist and hitting the wall, as if it would do something his blade couldn't. He grits his teeth painfully as he turns his back to the wall, sliding completely down into a seated position as he covers his face with a hand, slumping forward. This just can't be. No...
His breaths are shallow and rapid, gripping his hand against his face as he begins to panic.
[B] After the first day.
After Fear's message across the Network was received, he jumped right into the fray. If fear and combat was needed, he'll certainly go out of his way to achieve that. He walks around town with a new sense of determination. His face is stern and he'll approach anyone on sight, immediately set to battle with them, whether they're armed or not.
Upon seeing you, he instantly draws his sword and swings out without hesitation. He's not speaking nor taunting, nor does he look amused as he typically would. The goal is to get that wall down, and you're now the next target.
[C] Throughout 3/29 to 4/09
Yukari hasn't allowed himself to sleep since the Wall shot up and divided the Cave. He's been pushing himself far harder than he ever typically would. He looks nothing short of exhausted as he continues to walk around Side A, looking for anyone to antagonise to give Fear strength to tear down that damned wall. But with the mists rolling around, there has been a higher, and more dangerous, selection of monsters that are ready to pounde on anyone, and as one of those patches drift around him, a Varren appears and instantly attacks him.
Yukari dodges, if only barely, with his exhaustion overtaking his graceful skills. He tries to swing out his sword against it, but it keeps charging attack after attack at him, and it's wearing him down quickly. After attempting to counter a few more blows with his blade, Yukari's strength finally gives out and he collapses to his knees. He grips his sword and grits his teeth, certain that death will come and he can only hope it's swift.
[D] Alternative to C
Yukari hasn't been sleeping properly by any stretch of the imagination. He can't allow himself to. He's so desperate to get that wall down. On a break he might find himself beginning to doze off, but he'll quickly jerk himself out of it and continue on his way to prey on anyone he finds.
That's not to say he's immune to the other effects his psyche is taking out on him. In all of his desperation, panic, and not being able to see or talk to Curufin, it's breaking him apart from the inside, and the lack of sleep is assuredly only making that worse. Mix that in with pushing himself against man and monster alike and it's taken a thorough toll on his system.
When the stress becomes unbearable, and he wonders if this wall will ever get torn down, he collapses to his knees on the ground, burying his face in his hand. After a few moments, he finally lets out a pained sob. The worry overwhelms him - will he ever get to be by Curufin's side again? Will that wall ever actually come down? Does his fighting mean anything at all? None of his messages seemed to be getting through. Was Curufin even alive? Or had he left this world through the door without Yukari being able to know? This isn't fair, being forced to keep guessing. It's all starting to feel so hopeless.
What: Yukari's desperation during the Separation Event
Where: All around Side A
When: 3/28 through 4/09
Warnings: Violence, will update as needed.
[A] The First Few Hours
Yukari happened to be wandering around when the Cave divided. Seeing the wall shoot up to separate both sides makes the hair stand up on the back of his neck and he instantly reaches for his phone. Desperately he tries to call and text, but there's nothing. The reception seems to be completely out.
Without a moment's hesitation, he starts searching all around Side A, looking for someone at a very brisk pace. He's trying to keep his face stern as he tells himself not to worry, but it might glimmer into the true panic he feels from time to time as he continues to search.
When the search seems to be fruitless, he scrambles back to the wall. Looking for any weaknesses along it. And when that also fails, he unsheathes his sword and starts attacking the wall. He slashes away at it, coursing Green Electricity against it from time to time until he wears himself down and drops to his knees beside the wall.
Sweat drips from his brow as he grips at the wall with a hand. Why? Good God... "Why!?" he yells out, clenching his hand into a fist and hitting the wall, as if it would do something his blade couldn't. He grits his teeth painfully as he turns his back to the wall, sliding completely down into a seated position as he covers his face with a hand, slumping forward. This just can't be. No...
His breaths are shallow and rapid, gripping his hand against his face as he begins to panic.
[B] After the first day.
After Fear's message across the Network was received, he jumped right into the fray. If fear and combat was needed, he'll certainly go out of his way to achieve that. He walks around town with a new sense of determination. His face is stern and he'll approach anyone on sight, immediately set to battle with them, whether they're armed or not.
Upon seeing you, he instantly draws his sword and swings out without hesitation. He's not speaking nor taunting, nor does he look amused as he typically would. The goal is to get that wall down, and you're now the next target.
[C] Throughout 3/29 to 4/09
Yukari hasn't allowed himself to sleep since the Wall shot up and divided the Cave. He's been pushing himself far harder than he ever typically would. He looks nothing short of exhausted as he continues to walk around Side A, looking for anyone to antagonise to give Fear strength to tear down that damned wall. But with the mists rolling around, there has been a higher, and more dangerous, selection of monsters that are ready to pounde on anyone, and as one of those patches drift around him, a Varren appears and instantly attacks him.
Yukari dodges, if only barely, with his exhaustion overtaking his graceful skills. He tries to swing out his sword against it, but it keeps charging attack after attack at him, and it's wearing him down quickly. After attempting to counter a few more blows with his blade, Yukari's strength finally gives out and he collapses to his knees. He grips his sword and grits his teeth, certain that death will come and he can only hope it's swift.
[D] Alternative to C
Yukari hasn't been sleeping properly by any stretch of the imagination. He can't allow himself to. He's so desperate to get that wall down. On a break he might find himself beginning to doze off, but he'll quickly jerk himself out of it and continue on his way to prey on anyone he finds.
That's not to say he's immune to the other effects his psyche is taking out on him. In all of his desperation, panic, and not being able to see or talk to Curufin, it's breaking him apart from the inside, and the lack of sleep is assuredly only making that worse. Mix that in with pushing himself against man and monster alike and it's taken a thorough toll on his system.
When the stress becomes unbearable, and he wonders if this wall will ever get torn down, he collapses to his knees on the ground, burying his face in his hand. After a few moments, he finally lets out a pained sob. The worry overwhelms him - will he ever get to be by Curufin's side again? Will that wall ever actually come down? Does his fighting mean anything at all? None of his messages seemed to be getting through. Was Curufin even alive? Or had he left this world through the door without Yukari being able to know? This isn't fair, being forced to keep guessing. It's all starting to feel so hopeless.
no subject
Although he's certainly surprised when someone zooms into his rescue in what he suspected to be his final moments. And the fact that it's a hedgehog is certainly interesting, but he's seen stranger things in this cave. And he gives a nod of gratitude to his saviour as he pulls himself back up, using his sword for leverage. He's a little unsteady, but he manages.
"But of course. You have my thanks." Where he normally has an almost melodic tone, his voice comes out flat and worn and dreadfully serious. He takes a deep breath as he looks around him to see if anymore monsters threaten them at the moment, keeping his sword at the ready. His look of exhaustion doesn't leave him and he sighs softly for the moment. "You have an admirable amount of skill. I'm not certain if I could have taken that beast with only one hit in even my best condition."
But then, he relies more on speed and precision, not muscle and strength.
C. 3/30
"Your blade as dulled." Regis mutters as he looks over the purple-haired youth. There's a hint of concern within his old green eyes despite the sternness within his gaze. This marks the third time he've saved Yukari. Despite honestly not liking the youth much, Regis seems adamant about rescuing him. "Fall back and rest." He suggests as he let's his hand slide off the young man's shoulder.
"We have no need for a martyr here."
Regis stands to his full height once more as he takes up his glaive. Despite his own weariness, the king refuses to falter. He places himself in between Yukari and the incoming horde, his black silhouette shrouding him from view. For the most part, he doesn't seem too worse for wear but it's clear that he's quite fatigued as well. He doesn't bother fighting the fiends as he summons forth his barrier again. The king let's the fiends crack their skulls against his magical paling while idly killing those who manage to survive the collision. It's an effective tactic but tiresome at best for someone as aged as him.
no subject
"Your Majesty..." His tone is strained, but sincere. "I suppose I owe you yet another piece of my gratitude for saving me a third time."
He uses his sword as leverage as he pulls himself up.
"You misunderstand me, I am no martyr. I am just desperate to return to someone on the other side."
At least, he hopes Curufin is on the other side. He has had no luck with communications thus far, and he is truly beginning to dread that the Door may have taken his beloved away. Yukari's face glimmers a grimace to reflect that inner turmoil and pain. "I have to get back to them. And if my Fear will help Fear-chan, then who am I to complain?"
And watching Regis move to forefront, Yukari wonders for a moment if he should heed that warning to rest. He certainly won't be of any use in combat, but, at the very least, he has something he can offer the King. He charges out waves of Green Electricity at the beasts to diminish some of the ones from hitting the shield, and to also destroy some of the staggering remainders.
Yukari has seen a portion of weakness in Regis' defenses, and Yukari is doing his best to keep Regis from using too much of his resources while he fends off the other beasts. It's certainly the least he can do at this time.
"You know, Majestic-chan," Although that nickname is usually said in teasing, there is no lilt in Yukari's voice today to suggest that. He means it as respectfully as he can. "Do you suppose this wall will get torn down, or is it looking rather hopeless...?"
There might be evidence of pain in his voice as he speaks that. All he wants is to see Curufin again. He doesn't care if their love becomes public knowledge at this point. He's sorry for ever having withheld that in the first place. And waiting, trying to hold onto hope? It's killing Yukari from the inside. It's terrifying him to no end that he might not get to see the Elf again. Although, he is thankful that his King does not seem to be present to see him like this.
no subject
"Death will always find you regardless how hard you search. Therefore, don't squander your life so recklessly, even if...for sake of a reunion." His warning sounds so hallow within his ears since a part of him honestly doesn't believe in his own words anymore. The thought of suicide crossed his mind several times throughout his life but never so prevalent until after his wife died. While he truly desired to be there for his son, Regis sometimes doubted if he had the strength to continue without Aulea. The world seemed like such a colder place after she passed.
He almost couldn't bear it.
"Your devotion is commendable, Yukari, but I would rather you not push yourself so hard--" He pauses once the swordsman summons forth a staggering wave of electricity at the fiends that claw at the barrier. "...So you did notice." Regis whispers under his breath. While his impressive magic can hold up for a time, each strike against his force-field actually hurts him by draining bits of his mana. It seems that Yukari noticed that truth since their accidental meeting within the catacombs. Regis is slightly humbled.
"As long as we breathe there's still hope." He replies confidently as he turns his gaze back towards Yukari. "The Wall will fall or else we fall within its stead. I'm in no mood to die, therefore the wall must crumble." Just as soon as he makes that declaration, Regis summons forth a powerful volley of fire to scorch the remaining beasts. The fire is almost as tall as the barrier he created earlier, its red hot flames burning everything and anything into cinders.
"I refuse to let such a pitiful end happen."
no subject
The only thing that would keep Yukari from dying right now is, in fact, the pain he caused Curufin the last time he leapt into death's arms to recover his lost eye. I waited two days for you to return from the dead, and every minute of that time is etched into my heart. Knowing how badly that hurt Curufin, he still has regrets. And he still can't answer himself on if his own actions would be any different if he got so badly maimed again. So, he'd devoted himself to just never getting so badly hurt again instead.
Regis is right, Yukari shouldn't be squandering his life like this. If only because he doesn't want to make Curufin hurt like that ever again.
"I had noticed..." he confirms. Initially, Yukari had intended to keep that information tucked away until he was properly engaged in battle with Regis. But, right now, none of Ardyn's orders are relevant to him. Ardyn isn't on this side to see him not follow through, to witness how miserable Yukari is right now. And so long as that holds, Regis shall be his ally then, and will be treated as such.
Yukari's lips faintly curl upwards at the King's bold declaration that the wall must surely fall. For someone to have that much faith and drive, it actually boosts Yukari's mood a little.
"I'll hold you to that. I won't let myself die, either. Not until I get to see his face again and tell him how I feel. Thank you, for continually lending me your strength."
It's something different, really, despite the endless teasing and even the sometimes painful jabs; Yukari being inclined to fight with Regis, and even with new orders to make the man's life a Hell; Yukari feels like something shifted. The fact that Regis still came to his rescue after all he put the King through... Could Yukari be wrong? Is there something beyond Chaos that's worth reaching out for?
Yukari mentally discounts the thought. Curufin accepts him the way he is, Chaos and all. This is different. He's certain that Regis wouldn't be able to accept his Chaotic nature. Regis is on the side of Light and Good. Yukari knows this. Good and Chaos are like water and oil. They don't mix. What is friendship, anyway? Yukari finds it miraculous that he even found love. And it took him coming to another world to get it. Maybe there's something more to this after all...
For now, Yukari will ride this out, keeping that sense of confused conflict with himself at bay. Regis is an ally in this moment, and he loves Curufin. Those are the absolutes he must cling to right now.
no subject
"Then let us assure that you live to see him!" Regis states with a chuckle once a chilling cold aura wraps around him like a cloak comprised of ice. The icy mist gathers around the tips of his fingers as he summons forth gigantic shards of ice to rain down from above. He's going all out with his magic now, no restraint. Regis isn't holding back at all as he skewers the monsters with ease. Of course he's using far too much mana now but that doesn't matter. They need to push forward.
"This city is the oasis left to those who lack a tomorrow!" He shouts over the chaos. "It's up to us all to ensure it stands! If it falls, so do we, those who have no place to return." The barrier Regis creates suddenly shatters a second later only to be replaced by an impressive wall comprised of thick ice. This will give them a momentary breather for now and enough time for Regis to regenerate his magic before the monsters break through it.
"Friendships and bonds have been made here in Hadriel." He continues after he gains his breath."I mean to conserve this city and win it from the hands of our oppessors. If such a day comes, then perhaps this city will be more than just hole within a cave."
no subject
Under the protection of the ice wall, for them both to regain their strength, Yukari listens intently to Regis' following words: I mean to conserve this city and win it from the hands of our oppressors.
"Pardon? Is that a promise to ensure that we will never have to depart from the bonds made here?"
Yukari has to be certain that he has heard this correctly. If that is Regis' promise, then he undoubtedly will cast aside his own alignment to bring Regis' goal to fruition. For Regis and Yukari to share the same dream, nothing could be more beautiful.
"If you can promise me that, then I will name you my new King. You will have my undying loyalty, to bring that dream to fruition. I wish to see that promised land."
c. 4/8
When the tiny robot sees Yukari and the Varren, they rush to help, letting out a cry as they hit the monster with their tiny fist.
...It'll probably cause the creature more pain than expected.
no subject
"I can move." He says it before actually testing his footing to be sure that he actually can. He's not used to being at his limits. So, normally, being able to move would go without a moment's hesitation. His footing seems stable enough, albeit barely. But, as long as he doesn't bolt at a full sprint, he figures he should be alright. He'll use his Colourless Aura to defy some of gravity's pull to make it easier on himself.
"Feel free to lead the way, if there is a sanctuary we can reside in for the time being."
A rest is probably a good idea. He doesn't have to sleep, it just has to be something that will allow his stamina to return.
no subject
And the Varren doesn't appear to be amused, either. It roars as it turns it's attention to Turing, swiping at them.
Yukari struggles to stand to try and come to Turing's aid, only to find he seems to have completely depleted all of his strength. Rather poor planning on his part, really. He should have allowed himself to rest, but this is where desperation has brought him - teetering the line to tempt death as he fights to give Fear all of the strength he can muster.
And now Turing is in the line of fire. Before being separated from Curufin, Yukari wouldn't have cared, not one bit. He would have allowed Turing to die and let Hope resurrect them whenever he deemed fit. But... some of the people on Side A, they've made him question his morality.
And Turing is one of them. Just why is this little robot fighting to save him? Yukari can't imagine he's been pleasant enough to truly make an impression on Turing, especially since he only wanted to use them for information. Yukari huffs, feeling powerless. He'll have to figure out these emotions later. But for now...
"Turing-chan, run!" he calls out as the beast advances on the tiny robot.
no subject
"I've never strained myself before. Not like this. But there's something... someone important to me that I have to get back to. Fear-chan needs all he can get. So, I'll give everything I've got and more if I can. Perhaps that seems illogical. But the other person..." He sighs softly, painfully. "I've never had anything that meant the world to me before him. And I have to see him again so I can tell him that. I was such a fool for not having told him that before."
And now, I fear I may never see him again... Yukari rests his eyes a moment as he lays his head back against that wall. He can feel that familiar ache begging him to cry again. But he forces the pain back. This is no time to be more vulnerable than he already has been, emotionally and physically.
"I have something important for the very first time in my life to live for. That's why I'm pushing myself so hard."
no subject
"Hero?" Yukari muses back. He can't help but smile a little at that. He can't help but laugh a little at that. Hero? Hero. That certainly had an interesting ring to it. Him? A hero? Hardly.
"Would you still offer me that if I told you I'm not? It would be a waste if you gave that to someone you didn't intend to."
no subject
"How do I use it?" He wonders if there's anything like this on Curufin's side. Are they so lucky? Do they have it worse? He strains a sigh as he tries to push those thoughts aside. With this, he's certain he can aide Fear further. See Curufin sooner. He'll try not to push himself so hard but, with what's at stake, he certainly can't promise it.
no subject
Luckily for Shadow, Yukari is indeed not the whiny sort. He lets Shadow do as he wishes as he goes about healing the injuries, simply watching as he goes. Rather interesting device, actually. And he certainly won't complain for the good it seems to be doing.
When Shadow finishes, Yukari reclines back against the wall again.
"I suppose I'll owe you a proper thank you when we get out of this mess, hmm? When we're not surrounded by fog and beasts, when that wall is no longer present."
no subject
"You have my gratitude." He accepts the pen. He certainly does plan to drive himself into the ground as much as he can get away with. Warning or no, he still needs that wall to come down. He still needs to get back to Curufin. The pain without him is still greater than the pain he's enduring otherwise.
"I suppose I'll truly owe you something in return if I succeed in my goal." Luckily, for Shadow, Yukari will require at least a little bit of information. "Yukari Mishakuji. So you can look me up after we get through this."
He's not always good for everything, but this is a genuine favour being paid to him. He plans to pay it back someway, with a proper thank you.
no subject
He supposes when the pen no longer functions, that'll be his cue to remain even more vigilant in his own safety. Not that he's been particularly vigilant up until now.
"I look forward to seeing you again, Hedgehog-chan."
As for himself, he's going to stay here a little while longer. After that last scare, even he thinks he should take at least a small break.