[In truth, that part doesn't bother Ronan as much. It had never been about the direction for him as it had been about Gansey's feet leading him somewhere else. When he had nothing, he had Gansey's blind quest and his charismatic ambition. It hadn't always worked, Ronan hadn't always pushed himself to come home at night or leave his room in the first place or agree to anything- but it worked enough.
He doesn't really care what else there is, as long as Gansey is leading them to it, as long as they're all in. That's all that's ever mattered to him.
Not that things haven't changed, or that things won't change moving forward, but Ronan doesn't know how much. His mother is gone, Cabeswater is... complicated, everything is in the air, but Gansey is still here, and Hadriel is still here, and as long as they're all in this city then nobody can actually leave.
It's a sobering thought, and one that Ronan hadn't been intending- but once he considers it, he realizes the weight of it in a strange mixture of guilt and relief. At least they have this. At least this won't change, can't change. They may go through nightmares here, he may miss the Barns and Matthew and Orphan Girl, but at least he still has Gansey and Adam and all the others.]
We'll find it. [And then, he corrects-] -you'll find it. I know you will.
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He doesn't really care what else there is, as long as Gansey is leading them to it, as long as they're all in. That's all that's ever mattered to him.
Not that things haven't changed, or that things won't change moving forward, but Ronan doesn't know how much. His mother is gone, Cabeswater is... complicated, everything is in the air, but Gansey is still here, and Hadriel is still here, and as long as they're all in this city then nobody can actually leave.
It's a sobering thought, and one that Ronan hadn't been intending- but once he considers it, he realizes the weight of it in a strange mixture of guilt and relief. At least they have this. At least this won't change, can't change. They may go through nightmares here, he may miss the Barns and Matthew and Orphan Girl, but at least he still has Gansey and Adam and all the others.]
We'll find it. [And then, he corrects-] -you'll find it. I know you will.