Ushahin's Guide For Getting Along With Your Neighbors | Closed

[ushahin]

Who: Ushahin ushahin + the residents of House 1! (fortunefavored, verinumeri, skelebro, and ishotyouuu)
What: Ushahin invites himself over for dinner. Hilarity (or something?) ensues.
Where: Delight's Housing, House 1
When: 7/21
Warnings: Language, perhaps? Ushahin's mind-reading, probably.

Ushahin had woken up that morning and decided that he needed to get to know his neighbors better. No, really, that's about all the thought process he'd gone into before he'd made a pie and ended up on their doorstep as what passed for dusk in the cave approached. Their minds were most fascinating and the close proximity meant he kept getting snatches of random thoughts from the inhabitants of the house right next door to him. He'd never had neighbors before. Living in a castle was more like a miniature city.

So now he was doing the friendly thing. Plus, there was the possibility of getting a free dinner. He'd already introduced himself to three of the four and their relationship was best described as being...complicated. He knocked on the door until it was answered. "Good evening," he said politely to the one standing there. Without so much as a by-your-leave, he shouldered past him into the house. "I have brought a pie."

Comments

[ushahin]

Ushahin only moves his eyes, still unable to move his neck due to the gun shoved into his skin. He seems remarkably calm despite the circumstances, much more calm than Hermann himself is.

"Good evening, doctor. I thought that I should stop by and get to know my neighbors. It seemed the polite thing to do." The way he's talking, you'd think they were having a pleasant chat instead of Ushahin being held at gunpoint by a trigger-happy mercenary.

He'd ask the good doctor if he can get Wade to let him go, but he's afraid of pressing his luck. He's talking enough as it is.

[fortunefavored]

Newt follows Hermann up the stairs, freezing at the top of it, startled and moreover immediately, viscerally scared--but then Hermann meets his eyes and says the bit about cleaning up the mess and then THAT fucker says he's visiting, and there are just so many shades of N O P E happening in every corner of Newt's body right now. He wants him out. He wants him as far away from them as possible.

Except...apparently they're neighbors. Fuck.

"Well, if you hate cleaning up messes, Wade could always take him outside and shoot him." The statement is made fairly casually, but it's actually quite hard to tell whether he's joking or not. "Not that it would do us much good. Unfortunately he'd be back within a few days." ...Newt actually sounds regretful about that. Anyway, his eyes narrow as he folds his arms over his chest, mouth twisted into a scowl.

"Though I gotta wonder: since when did being polite mean anything to you, Ushahin?"

Yeah, that? That was straight up nasty. He's just going to stand here, glaring at Ushahin, and continue to be very, very displeased that he's in his house. He really hates this guy.

[skelebro]

Sans just watches this all go down with the same grin as always. If he had it in him to be vindictive, he might be getting some kind of twisted satisfaction out of seeing a gun get pointed to Ushahin's head. But he's not one for vengeance because vengeance is more or less bullshit, so he just finds it vaguely hilarious. Only vaguely.

"I didn't let him in," he clarifies in the general direction of his roommates who, to his mild relief (not satisfaction), seem to understand the...nuances of the guy and his particular abilities. "He just kinda let himself on in. Seems to enjoy that kinda thing."

WINK.

WINK.

NUDGE.

And, yep, Newt seems to take the exact same umbrage with Ushahin's contempt for privacy that Sans does. Except he's more obvious about it, thank god. Sans leans against the wall and opts to watch this play out.

B/C I'm out all day ALSO HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SHADE *AND* KAIYA!

[verinumeri]

It should be noted that there is no part of Hermann that wants to see Mr. Dreamspinner shot. There is, however, an actual grim and deep-rooted, gnarled satisfaction at seeing Mr. Deadpool so efficiently restricting the man with his gun. All the more when Mr. Sans elaborates on the unsurprising details (and evidently has spoken to Mr. Dreamspinner before). He may be lesser man than Mr. Sans, perhaps, for that satisfaction.

However, he also knows that physical restraint isn't what they need to worry about, and neither Mr. Sans nor Newton's heavy-handed insinuations will tell Mr. Deadpool enough about the need to tread carefully.

It is a shame, he does not quite consciously think -- there's a subconscious resentment of his need to be reasonable, as a heady part of him would like more to pat Mr. Deadpool enthusiastically on the back and thank him for handling the threat. But, he hasn't, and it's more complicated than that.

Mouth twisting, Hermann takes a step forward, lifting his left hand in a bracing gesture.

"Mr. Deadpool, allow me to explain, as you don't seem familiar. Mr. Dreamspinner here has a nasty ability and subsequent habit of going right into one's head and poking about for whatever he likes. I met him when I arrived when he convinced a spider it had already eaten me, effectively saving me from it -- so I've another reason for requesting that you don't shoot -- then proceeded to traipse right into my mind.

I did suggest to him that people would not take kindly to it."

Did Hermann just take a moment to say 'I told you so' to Mr. Dreamspinner, his eyes flicking meaningfully to his face?

Obviously.

"However, as Newton notes, he'd be back in a few days, and he also claims he can 'shatter' the mind, having threatened to do as much to mine when Newton aggravated him."

Too bad if that won't endear Mr. Deadpool to the man. He shouldn't have done it. The only concern? It could escalate things, so Hermann continues quickly.

"The point of that is, it's not clear to me how close he'd need to be to do it, and if you go killing him and he comes back and decides to have it out on one of us, well, let's be civil?"

As much as he loathes the indirect assertion that they shouldn't assault the man because of his ability to retaliate -- a kind of conceding to a terrorist -- it's practical and more important than petty barbs or how nice it would feel to have him thrown out. It does occur to Hermann that a man who could manipulate the minds of beasts and shatter those of men might be capable of planting or urging the thought of leniency, and indeed did. It is a crawling, deeply unsettling thought. All the more reason to toss him out. His preference for that, plus telling the worst of the details, let's him hope that isn't the case.

[ishotyouuu]

Yeah, that whole speech right there? Doesn't exactly fill Wade with the utmost confidence. If anything, it makes his eyes narrow all the more. Sorry Hermann, but all he's getting from that font of information is "this guy's a crazy psychic who can get into our heads and will probably burn our brains out if you kill him, so could you please not kill him?"

Still, Hermann's reasoning, while completely off the walls, regardless have some crazy amount of sense. After a few seconds, Wade takes the gun away from Ushahin's chin, keeping it close by just in case the psychic has any delusions of control over this situation.

"I'll be keeping an eye on you, pal. For the entirety of your stay here, you an' I are gonna be the bestest friends ever. And if anyone so much as twitches in a way that I don't like, you're gettin' a 10mm lead lobotomy, understand?"

[ushahin]

"The situation is very clear to me," he assures Wade, eyeing the gun with well-placed wariness. What a good guard dog he makes. For anyone else being threatened and clearly unwanted by the residents of this house, they might take this as a sign to leave. Ushahin, on the other hand, is determined to dig his heels in. He's not going to die today, not yet at any rate, and that's good enough for him.

He adjusts the shirt and cloak he's wearing, the fabric knocked askew when Wade had grabbed him. "Did it ever occur to you, gentlemen, that if I wanted to harm any of you, I could have done it anytime over the last month? Distance is of no concern to my powers. I've been next door the entire time and done nothing. Why would I now come in and willingly submit myself to a dangerous situation if harm was my intent?"

While their reasons for not trusting him are valid, and Ushahin knows better than anyone that he's not the nicest person to get along with, his intentions this evening had been purely friendly in nature.

[skelebro]

Hermann lays down the law, or the closest thing to it, and Sans watches placidly, hands buried in the pockets of his jacket. One of his eyesockets droops partway shut as the peace talk continues, his right socket parted lazily, as if he might start dozing at any second.

He's got a whole moral standpoint against killing in a general sense, even though it seems to him like human-types seem predisposed to indiscriminately do that to each other no matter what. Either way, he's a little bit relieved when Wade backs off. He'd hate to have to intervene on Ushahin's behalf. Really, he'd hate to intervene on anyone's behalf. Intervening is not what he does, strictly speaking. Ever.

Sans begins to laugh, a low, throaty chuckle.

"Not exactly selling yourself here, buddy," he says, as casual a tone as one might use to discuss the weather. "Just as a tip, it might be best if you start things off by listing your more redeeming qualities." And not by making a helpful sidebar of fyi, I totally could have hurt and/or killed you but I'm choosing not to out of the goodness of my heart.