it's not regret

[unfollowing]

Who: Emily, Wolfie, and y o u ! (Will match format.)
What: A girl and her wolf hang out after losing some friends to the Door. (Yes. Her wolf. Fight her. ...okay, the sad children's wolf. F i g h t h e r.)
Where: The sewing shop, the park, the lakeside, and the wildcard option
When: January 6
Warnings: Sadness. Emily. A lack of self-love on my part, yolo. Will update as needed.


sewing shop

Wolfie lies at her feet while she works, warming her toes as he looks, quiet and forlorn, at the shop door. Emily can't blame him. Now and then, she looks up too, half expecting Chris or Sam to walk in. Or even Ash, all excited about a new dye. (Ash has been gone for months, never got to meet Wolfie. She bets they would've liked each other.)

He's surprisingly gentle. Maybe he's got some dog in him, enough to know she's as upset as he is over losing friends, packmates.

When someone walks in, Wolfie will lift his head in their direction, attentive to any indication they might be a threat to him or the human girl he's spending so much time with.

"He only bites if you're an asshole," Em will add. What? Don't look at her like that. It's true.


park

She doesn't want to know what that bone he finds used fo belong to. As long as he's happy and not killing things right in front of her, she's fine. (He could've bitten Mike a little for her, geez, but no. That asshole had to go all wolf whisperer. Whatever.

Emily sits on one of the benches, and Wolfie curls up on the ground next to her, munching on his treat. She scratches him between the ears now and then, when she's not busy taking sips of Irish coffee that smells entirely too much of booze.


lakeside

Once, she and Chris had a heart to heart here. It was pretty brutal. One of them almost cried.

Now she sits at the edge of the lake and listens to the water while Wolfie alternates between pacing behind her and coming up to her to gently headbutt her in the arm. It's like he's reminding her there's still a life worth living, people worth living for. There's still Matt and Hannah and Beth. She shouldn't take them for granted, but right now she just... needs this. Time alone. Time to think.

A thick, nice-size branch floats over to her. Emily snatches it out of the water, glances at Wolfie, and throws the stick without another thought. Maybe Jack (it's pretty cool they know his name now) taught Wolfie how to fetch.

Or she just hit you with a stick. Win-win.


wildcard

(Come to me, all ye adults who deal healthily with your shit amirite.)

Comments

[unfollowing]

"Right? Like, he at least owed me that much. But no, he just kept making up excuses for how it made sense at the time and I shouldn't hold it against him. Fuck him, oh my god. Actually, no. I can't believe I did date him. Jerk."

...somebody's got a lot of anger to work through. But then again, Emily never forgets a slight, even if she forgives it. And she has so not forgiven Mike.

[knifecollecting]

"I feel that way about most of my exes." Jo laughs, smiling as she watches Wolfie some more.

"Maybe next time you see him he'll come to his senses."

[unfollowing]

"Maybe."

If he were less of a dick about it, she might forgive him, in time. But as it stands, she still thinks he deserves to go through at least some of what she and the others have been through here.

[knifecollecting]

"Even if he doesn't, whatever. You survived and you moved on." Seems like, at least.

She shrugs.

[unfollowing]

"Damn right." With the added bonus that Wolfie is now all but her best friend. Take that, Mike. "Whatever, he's not worth the time of day."

[knifecollecting]

She laughs again, reaching down to pat Wolfie's head gently.

"Or night. Just keep that in mind."

[unfollowing]

Wolfie accepts the pat, tilting his head up into Jo's hand.

"Oh totally." But she doesn't dream about him, thank god.

Then it hits her all of a sudden, the reminder that Sam and Chris are gone. Emily strokes Wolfie's neck to try and soothe that ache away. "I guess all that 'live every day like it's your last' shit is true here."

More so than at home.

[knifecollecting]

"We never know when we're going to be gone." She nods solemnly, sighing after she speaks.

Dead or back home, either one. And for her those two are one and the same. She still can't decide how she feels about it.

[unfollowing]

Emily doesn't know how it feels to know you can't go home because you're dead, but she does know that it's not a sure thing that she'll make it through the night on the mountain. You never know when we're going to be gone. Goddamn.

"Who would've thought this place would put your entire fucking life into perspective."

[knifecollecting]

"Right?" She laughs quietly, as if it's funny, when it's really not.

"I guess it had to be useful somehow."

[unfollowing]

Despite how cheesy that is, it does make her feel a little better. Well enough to head back to the house, at any rate.

"I should get back." She kind of wants to just lie down for a while. Steal Matt from whatever he's doing, just lie there holding each other. "I hope you don't bruise from this."

Damn, if she'd been aiming, she'd never been able to hit Jo like that.

[knifecollecting]

"I'll tell people I got in an awesome fight." She smiles, watching as Em stands.

"I'll see you around. Hopefully without a stick next time."

[unfollowing]

That's the spirit, Jo. Emily cracks half a smile at that.

"I'll look before I throw it next time. Come on, Wolfie."

Wolfie looks at Jo one more time before following Emily back to the house.