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ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏᴅᴛᴇᴀᴍ ᴏғ ʜᴀᴅʀɪᴇʟ ([personal profile] hadrielmods) wrote in [community profile] hadriel_logs2017-08-23 09:18 am

Event Log: Bad End

Who: All characters participating in the event
What: The event log for the Bad End event
Where: All over the city!
When: August 23rd-September 5th
Warnings: Bad futures, awkward conversations, smashed mirrors


You wake up to find a mirror at your bedside - a pretty nice one, too, a silver hand mirror perfect for fixing your hair in. Only when you try to do that, it's not your gorgeous reflection that you see. It's something else - a terrible future, just about as bad as anything you could imagine for yourself.

Maybe you see your loved ones dead on the ground, and you know it's your fault. Maybe you see the goal you've been working so hard for pulled out of your reach forever. Maybe you see someone you've hurt in the past ruining your life. Maybe you see your hot girlfriend leaving you to shack up with your worst enemy. Whatever you see, it really sucks, and you know that it's possible. This future could happen if you make the wrong choices, give in to your worst impulses.

Break the mirror if you want, but you'll see the same vision in any reflective surface in the city. You can't break them all, but you can sure try. And what will you do when you see your best friend's vision - and it features you betraying them?

Seek reassurance, give reassurance, lash out, vow to yourself that you'll never let it turn out that way, sink into the depths of sorrow because you feel like the future you see is inevitable. Whatever you do, it won't take away those visions - not until the event is over.

► This log covers August 23rd-September 5th.
► Feel free to make your own logs, as well
► Please tag headers of threads with content warnings where they apply
► Please put your character's name and open/closed in the subject line of your starters!
► If you can't handle the idea of your dark future, or maybe you just accidentally slip and fall on a mirror shard, let us know here.
ghostlocked: i never find the ice cream because i get the shivers and leave (srs • when i get to the frozen aisle)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-08-24 11:28 am (UTC)(link)
[Huh. Harlan wasn't exactly expecting that to work so quickly, but he's glad he doesn't have to put in the effort. He's struggling to keep his cool, here. If Michael's is really as bad as he's acting like it is, then Harlan can rest easy knowing this is bullshit. It has to be bullshit, right?

Knowing Michael, his reflection is just him accidentally stepping on a puppy's tail or something, but... He's talked to Michael enough times that they have a rapport, but they're not close enough to where Harlan has put any real stake in their relationship yet. He likes the guy, but if his mirror freaks Michael out to the point where they don't ever speak again, it's not like Harlan's missing out on much. Michael's too much of a chicken shit to make it weird in public. He'll probably just do that thing where he pretends like he's texting to avoid making eye contact when they pass each other on the street. Whatever.

He's dropped the cocky nonchalance when Michael returns with the mirror. This is serious for both of them, even if Harlan's sure he's about to get a peak into Michael's oh-so-horrible puppy-tail-stepping future.]


Yeah, and that includes Kyna. Especially Kyna. If you say a fucking word to her about this, you're dead, okay? [He smiles when he says this like he could be joking, but Michael's not stupid. He's not joking.

He holds out both of his hands, his mirror face-down in one and the other left empty so he and Michael can trade off at the same time.]
aroundthecoroner: (oh...)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-08-24 11:42 am (UTC)(link)
I won't tell her anything.

[He means that, too. Even if Harlan's thing shows him like, massacring kittens, (unlikely, given Harlan's established kitten-owner status,) Michael won't say a word. Because if he does, Harlan could either kill him with magic or, worse, tell someone about his mirror.

This is mutually-assured destruction.

Michael holds his mirror out in one hand, aimed at Harlan's empty one, then hesitates. This is... still really stupid. But whatever. He's not that smart anyway.

He reaches for Harlan's mirror as he places his own in Harlan's palm. Mutually-assured destruction, remember? It's fine.]
ghostlocked: and it is NOT a manic state (???)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-08-30 05:04 am (UTC)(link)
[Mutually-assured destruction has crossed Harlan's mind once or twice. Mostly, he's banking on the fact that his mirror won't really mean anything. Michael wouldn't recognize anyone other than Kyna, and shit, if he wanted to, he could excuse Kyna and all of the other bodies by claiming it's something related to his job. It's not like adventuring doesn't have a constant threat of death attached to it. He's sure he could convince Michael that this is just some bullshit "I couldn't save them" thing.

And he's not gonna recognize James. He won't recognize Harlan's mom, either. She looks like she did when he last saw her, when he was 8. Harlan's older than she was then. Michael won't be able to parse what's going on here.

He lets Michael take his mirror, and he takes Michael's. Alright, time to see what all the fuss is about.

...

He frowns, more confused and concerned than anything else.]


And, what, you think this is a glimpse into your future?

[He'll wait to see Michael's reaction before he decides whether he's going to press harder on that or call bullshit right away. His mirror can't be true, and if nothing else, he can't let anyone else think it would be.]
aroundthecoroner: (oh???)

cw for gore???

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-08-30 06:53 am (UTC)(link)
[Michael takes the mirror, almost afraid Harlan won't let go of it. If he's honest, he's tempted not to let go of his own, but he does. He flips Harlan's over. He's not sure what he was expecting, but it sure wasn't this.

The blood catches his eye first, because of course it does, and then he sees the bodies. A lot of bodies. And in the middle of them is Harlan, covered in gore and holding what's probably the thing that killed them all. There are other people there too but who cares about them because Harlan is a murderer and even before he's made that connection consciously he can feel the full attention of the Visitor shift to the person in front of him.]


Shit.

[He squeezes his eyes shut for a moment, trying to will back the tide. Stop it, this isn't real. His isn't real, not yet at least, so Harlan's isn't either. But it will be, so they might as well stop him before he starts. Except this whole thing isn't a guarantee. It's not enough to go on, not enough to make that call. Last time they acted on less than certainty, they might've got the wrong guy. Fuck.

It takes a bit, but Michael manages to reel it in, to get his breathing back under control. What did Harlan even ask him again?]


Yeah, probably. What do you think yours is?

[He is maybe watching for Harlan's answer a bit too intensely.]
ghostlocked: i never find the ice cream because i get the shivers and leave (srs • when i get to the frozen aisle)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-08-30 07:03 am (UTC)(link)
[Harlan licks his lips, thinking. How should he play this? How does he want to play this? He hasn't sorted out his actual opinion on this mirror thing yet, but... He was expecting Michael's mirror to clear everything up. And it should, given what he's seeing, but it just confuses the issue.

Harlan's mirror is everything he's afraid of. More than a few therapists have told him that it's not going to happen, though. It's just part of dealing with anxiety. He has control over his urges, even if he doesn't always feel like he does. This isn't going to happen.

So what's Michael's story?]


Why... would this be your future, exactly? [Lucky for Michael, he was too busy trying to interpret all of this to notice his strange reaction to their mirror sharing.]

I don't know what mine is. I'm not sold on the future thing, that's for sure. It's probably some fucked up trick designed to freak us out.

[And it's working, obviously.]
aroundthecoroner: (i can't believe you've done this)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-08-30 07:26 am (UTC)(link)
You don't believe me.

[It's not a question. He's more disappointed than he should be. It's a good thing. Harlan doesn't need to know.]

Whatever, I get it. Just forget about it, I'm probably reading too much into it.
ghostlocked: and it is NOT a manic state (aight lemme lay this out for u)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-08-30 07:36 am (UTC)(link)
[Harlan frowns.] That's not what I said. I know you as the wet blanket that spent a day following me and my friend around because you didn't know what else to do with yourself, then you show me this and say it's your future. Clearly, I'm missing something.

[And clearly he wants to know what that something is.]
aroundthecoroner: (for hours)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-08-30 09:13 am (UTC)(link)
[He doesn't appreciate the wet blanket comment but... it's not entirely unfair.

He shakes his head.]


You're still not going to believe me. It sounds fucking insane.

[He says, to the guy who turned himself into a potted plant with in five minutes of arriving in a cave city in another dimension- after which he said that wasn't unusual. Fine. Okay. Harlan gets a little credit.]

God, okay, I can't believe I'm saying this. [He takes a deep breath.] I'm... possessed, I guess.
ghostlocked: spooky or not spooky? (hmm • let's talk grasshoppers)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-08-31 07:33 am (UTC)(link)
...Hm. [He glances at the mirror again.]

It doesn't sound that insane. Granted, you did balk at the idea of interdimensional travel, so in retrospect I don't know where you get off, but I've seen possession before. You make a deal with a demon or something?
aroundthecoroner: (staring into)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-08-31 07:41 am (UTC)(link)
What? No. It's not a demon. It's a ghost... thing.

[Ghosts and demons aren't the same thing, even if the ghost is sort of like a demon?]

And listen, this is the first paranormal thing that's ever happened to me. [He thinks.] Where I'm from, demons and ghosts and magic and stuff? It's not real. Or at least nobody believes in it.
ghostlocked: i know, but grace was wondering (srs • what is succotash anyway?)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-08-31 07:44 am (UTC)(link)
[Harlan just "hm"s again. Sounds kind of like that whole fiasco with the shapeshifter and the innkeeper... Whatever. It's not important.]

Well, that shit's plenty real. [Which Michael is already aware of, apparently, so. Moving on!]

And you think the ghost possessing you is going to turn you into this. [He gestures at the mirror.]
aroundthecoroner: (oh...)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-08-31 09:45 am (UTC)(link)
Sort of. [He's not sure if the image in the mirror is literal or symbolic.]

It wants me let it kill people. And by that, I mean it hounds me over it. Sometimes it's weaker and sometimes it's stronger, but it's always there, it never shuts up.

[This is all probably way more info than he should be sharing, but again: they've come this far.]

If I keep giving in to it, I feel like eventually there won't be any difference between the two of us.

[He'll realize in a matter of seconds that he actually has overshared now, but that hasn't sunk in yet.]
ghostlocked: and it is NOT a manic state (uhhhhhhhh)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-08-31 09:52 am (UTC)(link)
[Harlan almost doesn't catch it. He's tired and jittery and stressed out of his mind right now.

But, wait.]


Keep giving into it. [He shifts a little, sits up a bit straighter. Maybe he should be afraid, given that this guy he's just met has basically let it slip that he's a murderer, but... What's Michael gonna do? If he tries anything, Harlan can literally just teleport up to his own apartment and lock the fucking door. Better yet, if push comes to shove, Harlan's a sorcerer. Michael is not. Check and mate.

And anyway, Harlan is now very, very curious. He's not going anywhere.]


How many people have you killed?
aroundthecoroner: (creepin)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-08-31 11:43 am (UTC)(link)
[Michael stiffens, his entire body going rigid. Fuck. Good job, idiot. It wasn't enough to tell Harlan that he's possessed, now he's told him he's a killer, too. Might as well just broadcast it all over the network, save everyone the time.

Except, weirdly enough, Harlan isn't freaking out. He's not running, or even acting like he wants to leave. Instead, he almost seems... interested? Michael's not sure what to make of that, until he remembers what he saw in Harlan's mirror.

Maybe they have more in common than he thinks?]


Two. [He flicks his eyes toward the mirror in his lap.] How many people have you killed?
ghostlocked: i never find the ice cream because i get the shivers and leave (srs • when i get to the frozen aisle)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-09-01 09:20 am (UTC)(link)
[Harlan nods slowly, dropping his eyes to Michael's mirror. He turns it over in his hands, fingering the ornate designs etched into the silver. So Michael has killed people. That's not necessarily a dealbreaker... Harlan's killed people too, though he has a feeling Michael isn't talking about casualties from his job.]

I don't know. Kyna and I are in one of those adventuring guilds. Kairos. [...] Maybe they don't have those where you're from. People hire us to do dangerous shit like hunting down magical artifacts or exterminating dragons, shit like that. I've killed some people through my job. Usually, they were trying to kill us first.

[But that's not what Michael's asking. He knows that. His point is: His hands aren't completely clean.]

Um. Recreationally? No one. Even if you include the people I've killed as part of my job, the number in that mirror is a wild overstatement.
aroundthecoroner: (love's perfect ache)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-09-02 07:03 am (UTC)(link)
[Yeah, for whatever reason, the Visitor's not as interested in self-defense killings. It seems to go after victimizers instead of victims themselves. Murder, not manslaughter. Not that Michael thinks it actually knows the legal difference.]

So why would it show you something out of left field, and then show me something that actually makes sense? And if you don't kill people, why does it bother you so much?

[He gets that part of it would be seeing Kyna dead, and Harlan probably knows those other people in the mirror, too, but... still. If there's no chance it would happen, why freak out?]

... And why doesn't me having killed two people bother you at all?
ghostlocked: i know, but grace was wondering (srs • what is succotash anyway?)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-09-07 04:42 am (UTC)(link)
[He's glad, at least, that Michael is fixating on the gore in his mirror more than any of the other frills. He was counting on that, and Michael hasn't let him down. The rest of it is what's really digging at him, though the body count is upsetting in its own right.]

I didn't say it was out of left field. I said I've never killed anyone like that.

[He licks his lips, not sure if he should keep going. As much as he hates talking about this shit, it does help in the long run, and it's not like he has anyone else he trusts enough to tell here. There's Kyna, yeah, but... He's not sure she'd understand. Even if she did, he can't dump this on her. Getting her to talk about her own problems is enough of a struggle. Maybe he'll tell her about it some day, but not out of desperation. Not just because he has no one else. He doesn't want to force her to be his crutch.

Michael, on the other hand... Mutually assured destruction. Michael has killed before, even if under wildly different circumstances, so he has to understand on some level. And, best of all, they don't know each other well enough yet for any of this to permanently damage a friendship he cares about. If this blows up in his face, he's not losing much.]


But I want to. In a sense, anyway. I don't want to hurt anyone, not really, but I think about it sometimes. Often. I've worked very hard to resist it. There's always a risk, though. The mirror does make sense. Maybe in the future I'll get tired and say fuck it. I've come close before.

[...]

I guess that's why you being a murderer doesn't bother me. A lot of shit that should bother me doesn't.
aroundthecoroner: (on a leash)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-09-07 08:17 am (UTC)(link)
[Never killed anyone like that. Michael watches the hesitation in Harlan's expression. What's he getting at? And then it drops. Harlan hasn't killed anyone he didn't have to... but he wants to. He has to resist it. There's always a risk. He's come close before.

There's a quick war in Michael's head, point versus counterpoint. Harlan's a danger, they should take him out before he snaps. But no, that's not fair. It's only a matter of time. But he's trying. Look at the body count in that mirror. He's trying. That counts. It has to.]


You get it. [He says that before he even knows what he means.] I mean, kind of. It's probably less literal for you.

[His emotions are doing a lot of things right now. The one that surprises him most is relief. Somebody else gets it. Somebody else has to deal with the same shit. Maybe it's not a shrieking monster in his head, but Harlan's had to fight something too. Only... he's apparently better at it.

A lot better.]


I guess the main difference is that my limit was lower.

[Harlan's not a target. Michael's already worse than he is. And that's where he's leaving that.]
ghostlocked: that achieved sentience (sad • i'm a bad idea)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-09-09 08:22 am (UTC)(link)
[He nods, dropping his eyes to the floor. Michael's not wrong. It's less literal, but it's also not fair to compare the two things, not exactly. There are a lot of factors that don't line up perfectly.]

How long have you had this thing? I've been dealing with this shit my entire life. I had my entire childhood to get a handle on it before I was capable of doing any real damage. I've had help. Kyna doesn't know, yeah, but my girlfriend does. I've talked to therapists about it.

[He shrugs. Maybe that's why he isn't bothered by the number. Sure, that's two human lives, but it's also only twice that Michael has fucked up. The number could be higher. Harlan knows better than anyone how difficult this kind of thing is to resist.]

It fucking sucks regardless, but I'm betting you've been at a disadvantage. Even with the time and the support, sometimes I'm still surprised I've managed to get this far without too many fuck-ups.
aroundthecoroner: (open flames)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-09-09 10:03 am (UTC)(link)
[Michael isn't sure what he's expecting in response. Maybe for Harlan to say that he's being dramatic, or something about how shitty it is that he's got such a bad grip on things. Harlan's been dealing with it his whole life, it's probably a lot worse for him, and at first that's what Michael thinks he's about to hear.

What he doesn't think he's about to hear is someone cutting him some slack. He doesn't know how to react to that. He's killed two people. He doesn't deserve slack.]


Two and a half years. But before- [Hm. Does he mention the blood thing? Harlan's mentioned way worse urges, and he's already admitted to murder, himself... Nah. He's not touching that one. It's not the same as a murderghost.]

I haven't told anybody. Not before now. I'm pretty sure they'd just think I was nuts, and therapy's not going to fix this.

[It never did before, anyway, even with the non-supernatural stuff.]
ghostlocked: i never find the ice cream because i get the shivers and leave (srs • when i get to the frozen aisle)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-09-12 12:12 pm (UTC)(link)
You literally haven't told anybody? [Harlan frowns. That's concerning, though not entirely surprising. Harlan absolutely would've gone off the rails by now if he hadn't had help. Two and a half years is a long time to be alone.]

When you get back, you should. Finding the right doctor takes some trial and error, but it's worth it. It helps. [He pauses.] You said you're possessed. That's fixable. Having killed two people isn't, but fixing that shit isn't the point. I'm not fixable, either. That's just how it goes.

[It's taken many, many years to accept that, and a big part of him still hasn't. Regardless, there's no changing it.]

Before what? [Of course he caught that.]
aroundthecoroner: (my senses fooled me)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-09-13 07:05 am (UTC)(link)
No, no. No. [Michael's already saying it before Harlan's finished asking his question, shaking his head.]

I can't tell anybody. Not even doctors. [Especially not doctors.] I know you're from a place where magic is a thing, but where I'm from, only crazy people believe in that stuff. Saying I have a ghost in my head that tells me to let it kill people is a one-way ticket to a psych ward. I mean maybe they'd try meds first, but those won't help, and they'll think I'm a danger to other people, which I fucking am, so they're never going to let me out.

[It is perhaps clear by his rising pitch that this is, in fact, a nightmare scenario to him. God, okay, get a grip. He needs to calm down.]

And exorcisms, god. I don't even know if that's real. I don't know if it would work. This thing isn't some kind of demon, and I'm not even religious. [And hard pass on the whole being held down and yelled at for days. No thanks.

He stops for a couple deep breaths.]


Before. Right. Before the Visitor I had... another thing. Not a supernatural thing. This is way worse than that. But that's not gonna help my case if I go in somewhere telling them I'm hearing voices.
ghostlocked: but i would like to die naturally soon (srs • i would never kill myself)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-09-17 09:24 am (UTC)(link)
Hm. Okay, that does complicate things. Sorry. Didn't mean to strike a nerve. [Harlan definitely understands the desire to stay the fuck out of an institution. It's a miracle he's managed to avoid one himself.]

Look, if you can't get rid of it back home, maybe there's someone who can help with it here. [He's already thinking up potential strategies, but he'll keep them to himself for the moment. Michael is overwhelmed enough as it is.

As for that last bit, hm. He bites his lip.]
You don't have to tell about about the other thing, but you can if you want to.
aroundthecoroner: (i can't believe you've done this)

[personal profile] aroundthecoroner 2017-09-18 10:44 am (UTC)(link)
Maybe. I don't know.

[He is overwhelmed, but that's not the only reason he doesn't want to get into potential solutions here in Hadriel. He doesn't know how any of these powers work, how they might interact with the Visitor. He doesn't know how capable it is of fighting back. He doesn't know if what happens here stays here, if the thing would just be there in his head again the second he returned to Earth.

And, well. There are other reasons. Reasons he's very much not going to discuss.

Speaking of things he doesn't want to discuss...]


The other thing makes me sound really fucking crazy. [And besides that, he doesn't know where to start with it. He's never actually told anyone this; people have found out, sure, but that's not the same. He's always had this story taken from him, instead of giving it of his own free will. Which... Harlan isn't doing.

He's giving him a choice. And that actually makes it tempting. It can't be any worse than what he's already said, right? It can't be worse than "I'm a murderer". Michael runs a hand through his hair.]


If I do tell you, you have to promise something. Don't tell me how messed up it is, even if you're thinking it.
Edited (too fucking repetitive lmfao) 2017-09-18 10:46 (UTC)
ghostlocked: spooky or not spooky? (hmm • let's talk grasshoppers)

[personal profile] ghostlocked 2017-09-20 07:06 am (UTC)(link)
[Harlan just shrugs.] It's your call. Wouldn't hurt to look into it, but do what you want.

[He's not here to tell Michael what to do. Plus, he's got his own shit to worry about. He doesn't have time to strongarm Michael into figuring his shit out, even if he wanted to.

Hm, though. He's curious. A minute ago, Michael made it sound like this subject was off limits. What's with the change of heart? If he's really willing to open up so readily, well. That's trouble in and of itself. Not for Harlan, but for Michael. He really has been on his own out here, hasn't he? Man.]


Alright. I promise I won't tell you if I think it's fucked up, but I doubt I will. [Considering everything else they've already talked about, he can't imagine what would register as more fucked up now.]

yep

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