Event Log: End of Arc 2

[hadrielmods]

Who: All characters
What: The event log for the End of Arc 2
Where: All over the city
When: November 25th-December 12th
Warnings: A full-scale battle, including character death, NPC death, and various other ways to suffer

It was bound to happen. The Null warned you, after all, and this has been building for awhile - and now it's here. First comes the initial attack, the agents of the Null attacking Hope's temple. Then, an SOS, warning the city of what's happened: a betrayal, and Hope being injured. Luckily for everyone, thanks to the actions of his guards Hope survives the attack. Unluckily, his attacker, the goddess Delight, escapes and lets the Null in.

Flooding into the cave, the Null will attack anyone who they believe is resisting them. They'll destroy buildings and deploy dangerous crowd control weapons, in addition to their sheer strength and speed. Confusion empties the monsters in the tunnels into the city, to help distract the Null. Some gods fight, others provide safe havens, but everyone is in danger.

After about a week and a half of the attack, Fear summons enough power to teleport the city. This stops any new Null from arriving through the tunnels, but the remaining Null must be hunted down and destroyed, or else they'll signal their location to the rest of their species. The danger will lessen as Null are taken out, but things won't really be safe until Fear moves the city again, so don't get too comfortable.

What will you do? Run and hide? Fight? Help the fighters? Turn on the gods yourself? Whatever you do, it's time to make a decision.

► This log covers November 25th-December 12th.
► Feel free to make your own logs, as well
► Please tag headers of threads with content warnings where they apply
► Please put your character's name and open/closed in the subject line of your starters!
► If you get taken out by the Null, please let us know here.

Comments

[unknowable]

I'm okay.

[Physically, he's fine. Nothing touched him - Cabeswater or Ronan's monsters keeping the Null from ever getting close enough to be a real threat. It could have been so much worse for him, and he knows that. But Ronan getting hurt - that was bad. And he isn't sure yet whether spending so much time wrapped in Cabeswater will have real consequences.

It helped at the time. The forest, as much as its thoughts are unlike anything human, wants Adam to be happy and safe. It wants that for Ronan as well, and it did what it could to make that happen. But for Adam, that meant letting it hold a piece of his humanity. He thinks he got it back, but it doesn't quite rest easy on him yet.]

I don't really... feel like myself yet.

[It's easier when he has things to focus on. Rolling bandages, checking Ronan's wound, organizing supplies. The solid reality of things, so far away from the magic that was coursing through him. He doesn't want to be distant, not when he thinks Ronan might need him, but he can't seem to help it.]

I've never used Cabeswater's power for that long before.

[greywaren]

It's not good for you.

[He ventures, tentatively- but when has this been good for either of them? He glances away, not expecting Adam to disagree. They both know that what they've been doing has pushed things too far on both their ends, but it's not like they can do anything else about it.

Seeing Adam like this, tangled up in the forest, alien and cold and consuming- at one point, it was thrilling. Ronan found himself dreaming of subjugation by an icy forest-king, and he found himself thinking about it when Adam's fingers were on his thighs. But now, when it's gone on for this long, he's beginning to understand why Gansey was afraid of it.

He hopes it isn't permanent, he hopes that Adam can pull back- but if he can't, Ronan will love him all the same.]

I think we just need- time. [Maybe. Hopefully. If recovery is possible at all.] We'll go back to it later, fix the holes we made. You'll even out. Just- we have to survive this bullshit first.

[unknowable]

Yeah.

[He thinks that Ronan is right - or maybe he just wants to believe that he is. With time and some careful repairs to Cabeswater, it'll get better. Ronan won't be in danger when he sleeps, Adam will feel more like a real human being. They'll survive this, and they'll figure it out from there.

He wants that to be true. He is disturbed by the distance he feels still - he thought that when he let go of Cabeswater everything would come back, but he should have known better. It hasn't always worked that way before. And now it's like there is a wall of glass between him and what he feels. He can see them, he knows what they should be, but he doesn't quite feel them.

It helps to be near Ronan. Cabeswater loves Ronan, and Adam loves Ronan, and the emotion is closer than anything else right now. Maybe not quite as vivid and intense as it is normally, but - it's something. Something to eat away at the coldness inside him.]

We'll survive. Even if I have to use up everything that Cabeswater has left, we're going to survive.

[He touches the tips of his fingers to Ronan's bandage, nothing more than that.]

I could - maybe help with this.

[greywaren]

[It's all well and good to say that they need more time, but they do need to survive this first. All of the damage they've done to Cabeswater, they've done for a reason and that reason was survival. There's a more pressing issue at hand and that is just making it through this, before worrying about any of the other matters needling at the back of their heads.

Not that either of them are much use now- well, not that Ronan is. Adam still can bandage wounds and do first aid and be helpful, while Ronan mopes around and tries not to sleep for the foreseeable future. Feeling useless has never been fun, but now when their very lives are in danger, it's hard not to just storm outside and try to make some kind of difference.

But he doesn't. He knows better than that.]

What do you mean?

[He finally asks, curious. It's already cleaned and bandaged, he's not sure how else Adam might be able to- but then it hits him and his face tightens for a moment, unsure if it's really a good idea.]

You mean like... back when my arm was broken? That Cabeswater stuff?

[unknowable]

Like that.

[He doesn't think he can heal it - but maybe he can. It's not entirely outside of the realm of possibility. Cabeswater doesn't seem to have limits, exactly. The power of the ley line might ebb and flow depending on how it's blocked, but it doesn't seem like there are many things that are purely impossible to use it for. Just things the forest might not understand, things Adam might not know how to do.

So maybe he could heal Ronan. But he knows that he can soothe away the pain, at least, pull it away from Ronan the way Cabeswater pulls upsetting things away from Adam. He can help the healing, make sure that it heals without infection. Little things.

He just wants to do something for Ronan. He just wants to remember what it feels like to help someone like that. He doesn't really know what else to do. He wants to help Ronan, not wrap a bandage for someone he barely knows, organize supplies, clean things.]

Or... something else. If you think it would help.

[greywaren]

[He isn't sure if it's something they should go forward with- Adam is already spreading himself thin with all of his other responsibilities, and Ronan doesn't want to cause any more strain on Cabeswater than what's already there. He knows all too much about pushing Cabeswater past the brink at this point, particularly with how much he's already done- would it even want to help him anymore, or would it be too hurt?

The conflict is clear in his expression, and Ronan sighs, running a hand over the bandages, feeling the familiar pinpricks of pain that comes with the healing injury.]

I can live with it.

[He says quietly- not a refusal or a rejection, but just so Adam knows. It seems like a waste, when they're already spread so thin, but he's not one to deny Adam when he knows that the other boy wants to help. Maybe he wants to feel useful (he is). Maybe he wants to feel like he's helping Ronan (he is). Maybe he just wants to do more.

Ronan bites his lip, reaching out for Adam then, tangling their fingers together.]

But if you think it's safe- it would help.

[unknowable]

[He knows Ronan can live with it - Ronan is tough, Ronan has lived with the pain of bruises and cuts and far more painful things. He can live with this, too. But Adam doesn't want him to. Adam doesn't want him to have to endure pain and discomfort, and if he could keep Ronan from ever having to experience those things at all, he would.

But he can't. All he can do is this. And right now it feels important, because he isn't quite himself, because his connection to Ronan is one of the few things that feels truly real right now.]

It'll be safe.

[Cabeswater might not be happy with Ronan, but Adam is certain he can keep it from hurting him. The forest loves Ronan, it just doesn't understand the things he needs - it reflects his state of mind, so as Ronan struggled with the need for weapons and other implements of destruction, it grew more and more off-kilter.

Adam doesn't disagree. Ronan should be making beautiful things, impossible creations. Not things to hurt people with. But he needed to, just like Adam needed to use Cabeswater's power.

He moves closer and reaches out to press his fingertips to Ronan's arm. The contact probably isn't necessary, but it might help. And then - well, what else is there? He reaches out to Cabeswater, lets the forest enfold him again, branches and leaves and grass against bare feet, fresh air and sunlight. And darkness, twisting all around him, but Adam pushes that away and focuses on the light instead, on warmth and contentment and healing. To take away Ronan's pain, at least, if not more.]

[greywaren]

[A shiver creeps down his spine when Adam touches him and his first instinct is to move closer, as it always is. He holds his ground though, watching the point of contact- just a bruch of fingers against his arm, but he can feel Adam with his pulse, and while he's normally deadened to Cabeswater when he's awake, part of him can feel that too.

It's difficult to pinpoint where exactly it starts- where Adam's touch ends and the warmth of his magic begins- but when Ronan feels it burrowing into his skin he finds himself holding his breath, lower lip sucked between his teeth. He thinks about the sun through the leaves, the water idling along through the river, and the triumphant look on Adam's face when he's moved a rock or a branch or something in the right way to allow the magic to flow again.

Cabeswater is confused by him, but he can still feel it the way it's meant to be felt through Adam, and it feels like brightness and green. His arm begins to tingle as if it's going numb- which it may very well be, because the pain from the laceration is steadily slipping away from him in a sensation that he's felt before but still manages to surprise him.]

Damn, [he whispers on an exhale, while flowers blossom and leaves brush through his mind. It's difficult to focus on anything else when he feels it, so familiar and so comfortable that he finds himself slipping away a little, reaching for the sensation that he's missed.

It doesn't hurt anymore. Of course it doesn't- Adam is the magician; like this, Ronan thinks that he could do the impossible a thousand times over.]

[unknowable]

[As sometimes happens when he sinks into the magic like this, Adam doesn't entirely know what he's doing. He knows, but he couldn't break it down to its individual parts, which is always a strange thing for a boy who's usually so good at that. Instead it's more like an experience, a moment, nothing he can quite put his finger on.

Cabeswater hums in the back of his mind, curling its leaves around him, and this time it doesn't try to soothe any of his emotions away. They're out of danger, at least for the moment, and Adam isn't stressed or scared or worried. He's full of quiet wonder instead, wonder at what he's able to do with the power of Cabeswater, of the ley line. That, and his feelings for Ronan, the sort of deep unwavering devotion that he once didn't think he was capable of feeling.

When he thinks it's done, he lets his hand fall, and looks at Ronan. Part of him wants to inspect the wound, see if it's improved at all, but that's the scientist in him. It doesn't really matter. What matters is that Ronan isn't hurting as much. And that, Adam can see in his face.]

Better?

[He feels better, though it's strange to say. Just being able to do something like that, something good, helps.]

[greywaren]

[Ronan nods, reaching up to rub at his arm- itchy and a little tingly where before it was just painful. It feels like if he pulls back the bandages, he'll find leaves pressed against his skin, but of course that would be impossible.]

Yeah.

[He offers Adam a small smile- maybe his first since his dreams began turning on him. It's a little weak, but the pleasure of it is there, and he reaches up with his good hand to clasp his fingers around Adam's forearm, tilting his head up so that he can pull the other boy in for a kiss.

It doesn't last long, their kisses never seem to last long enough anymore, but it's enough to hold him over until the next disaster, and Ronan flexes his fingers, getting used to the sensation of his not-so-injured arm.]

Thanks.

There's a pause, and Ronan refocuses his gaze somewhere behind Adam, where people are still rushing around in a flurry, tending to the injured, stocking supplies, issuing orders. It's not a place that Ronan has any business trying to be in, but he doesn't know where else to be- now that he's useless. The least he could do is be near Adam for his own, selfish comfort.]

You should probably get back to it.

[unknowable]

[Ronan is right. He should be helping, making himself useful, centering himself in the here and now instead of reaching for Cabeswater. And he wants to - he does. But he also wants to stay here, with Ronan, where he feels more human than he has in days. Since this started.

That smile helps. That kiss, and Ronan's touch on his arm. Simple things, small things, but Adam feels like if he had more - if they could just hide away together, lose themselves in each other - he'd finally feel real again. But that has to wait. It would be supremely selfish, and on top of that, it's not like they have any privacy or any safe place to do something like that.

He reaches out to brush his fingers against Ronan's cheek, a quiet gesture of affection.]

Yeah. Just - tell me if it starts hurting again.

[At least Ronan is there. At least he'll be there, and Adam can look at him and remember that this is all worth it.

He pulls himself away with some difficulty, refocuses on the things he can do. The things he needs to do. They'll get through this, and they'll have each other, and they'll find a way back to balance. Adam believes that. But first, they have to get through it.]

I'll be nearby.

[He won't leave Ronan's sight unless he has to. But he moves away, making himself useful. That helps, too.]