Event Log: The Stampede

[hadrielmods]

Who: All characters participating in the event
What: The event log for Stampede event
Where: All over the city
When: December 26th-December 28th
Warnings: None

There's a rumbling sound in the air early in the afternoon on December 26th. Whether you're new in town or you've seen it all, something like this hasn't happened before. Is it an earthquake? It feels kind of like a small one, and that might be endurable if not for the sudden snarling and gnashing of teeth!

As it turns out, these yet-unnamed apex predators are overrunning the city, ignoring their previous apprehension to barrel right through anything- or anyone- that stands in their way. Seemingly spooked by something, they are aggressive and violent and won't hesitate to tear anyone they meet to pieces... after trampling them underfoot, of course. They're so large and muscular that they may even take a few portions of buildings with them- how would you like to see one of these monsters crashing through your living room?

At least it's only these weird mammoths, though... right?

► This log covers December 26th-December 28th.
► Please tag headers of threads with content warnings where they apply
► Please put your character's name and open/closed in the subject line of your starters!
► If you get squished, please let us know here.

Comments

[itsnotaonesie]

[Peter gives her a thumbs up and leaps into action. Literally, he jumps up onto the side of the building and shoots some webbing at the first mammoth to run up at them, sticking it to the ground while it's buddies running up behind it all slam into it's butt.]

We can probably pick them off one at a time, might be the safest way to tackle this.

[toiletseat_girl]

[she gives him a thumbs up in response and tries to steel herself. she can fucking do this. she thinks. she hopes.

she doesn't have much choice.

and holy shit, that's a lot of mammoths.

she runs up to the one with the webbing and calls out]

Right. Probably better to go for the throat, 'cause I'm guessing the heart is way, way, way hard to reach.

[itsnotaonesie]

[If anything goes wrong, Peter will grab her and stick her on the safest roof he can find. He's very well acquainted with the roofs in town at this point.]

Sounds like that's the best strategy. That's a lot of fur and muscle and bone you'd have to stab through otherwise.

[And he webs another one down for her. This might actually work out pretty well after all]

[toiletseat_girl]

[nothing's going to go wrong. because she's a fucking grown up who can handle shit. really. (yes, this is her attempt at an internal pep talk and she realizes it's lame)]

Okay, so I'm just gonna go over there and avoid the snappy, bitey teeth and stab the motherfucker in the throat.

[which she does. blood sprays everywhere. kind of like that scene with the Black Knight in "Monty Python & the Search for the Holy Grail."

but it looks like it's working? on to the next!]

[itsnotaonesie]

[Note to self: WEB THOSE MOUTHS. Peter doesn't want his buddy getting chomped on.]

That was really gross! Also good job. But also that was really gross.

[He webs down a couple more, making sure to web their creepy bitey heads down so they can't grab George]

[toiletseat_girl]

[yes, yes, sounds like a plan. those teeth look nasty and she doesn't want any part of them near any part of her.

and she's wiping blood out of her eyes and some of it got in her mouth and her nose and nasty]

Yeah, it kind of was. I wonder if I can manage to get 'em from the side, so the blood sprays somewhere that's not me. Maybe if I stand at an angle...?

[which she does. and still manages to get bloodspray right in the face. she's kind of. dripping with the stuff now and is looking. . . not pissed off exactly. just kind of. resigned to her fate]

...motherfucker.

[itsnotaonesie]

Ooooh that is. Super gross.

[He actually gags a little. That is the nastiest. Well, it's the second nastiest thing ever. It would be nastier if it was in his mouth.]

You know what, maybe we should get you a mask.

[toiletseat_girl]

[she's choking out blood and she looks like Sissy Spacek in "Carrie" after she got doused with the blood. it's just plain gross. she looks gross, she feels gross]

Not feelin' any better on this side, either.

[she tries to wipe her face off, but it's a futile effort. she doesn't care how much effort it takes for other people, but she's taking a long, hot bath when this is done]

No, at this point I think the damage is done. I need to accept my fate and make peace with it.

[itsnotaonesie]

[GROOOOOOOOOOOOOSS. but yeah for sure she has totally earned a long hot bath after this.]

Dude, that cannot be sanitary. It's never too late to slap on a mask.

[toiletseat_girl]

[sorry, George is about 50% George and 50% mammoth blood at this point, it's awful, this is why she sticks to the Clinic during a crisis, but damnit there are still. more. mammoths.

she sighs and wonders if she looks as bedraggled as she feels] Nah, it's cool. Damage has been done. I'll just have to, like. Eat my body weight in mammoth steaks as revenge.

[itsnotaonesie]

Now that sounds like a plan I can get behind.

[Yeah Peter's on top of the mammoths. Literally, he's taken from hopping from mammoth to mammoth and webbing them down as he goes, whacking some of the bitey ones in the head.]

[toiletseat_girl]

I thought so. Too bad there are no potatoes we could bake for a side dish. We could've had those, some lettuce from Pell's garden, it woulda been like going out to eat in a nice place.

[and she's moving down the line, skewering each mammoth in the jugular. it's messy, messy work and it's only getting messier, but. whatever. it's not like this is the first time she's been doused with another being's bodily fluids]

[itsnotaonesie]

See now my body's giving me all these mixed signals, because all this blood is making me queasy but the idea of like the best food ever is making me hungry and now my stomach is just confused.

[WOW THAT'S SUPER GROSS George needs to get better at dodging fluids.]

[toiletseat_girl]

Concentrate on the awesome meal. I'll find some potatoes. Someone has to be growing 'em. I'll find out. [a.k.a., steal them.

[AND IT SO IS, but this is her fate now, so she's going with it. she doesn't know how to use her sword other than /stab blindly! so she's kind of paying the price for that]

[itsnotaonesie]

Isn't it too cold to grow stuff? Like even indoors, its been pretty awful.

[You know what it's a pretty good strategy and it's working out so far. GO TEAM. Also Peter's secretly glad that he's not doing the gross part, but shhh.]

[toiletseat_girl]

Someone said something about warming runes, whatever those are. I figure I'll just go through the lots, looking for potatoes and go from there.

[she really should be used to bodily fluids by now, what exactly is her problem. OH YEAH, THAT SHE'S NOT USED TO BEING BUKKAKED IN THE FACE BY THEM]

[itsnotaonesie]

A whatty-what? A warming rune? Is that more of that magic whosy-whatsit?

[Is a bukkake of blood a bloodkakke??

Wow this got super gross, Peter's just going to go back to choke slamming mammoths]

[toiletseat_girl]

Yeah, sure is. Not any magic I know, but whatever. I know plenty of other magic.

[bragging? her? impossible!

...okay, so she's totally bragging. makes up for the blood nonsense. SHE'S CAPABLE OF OTHER STUFF, OKAY?]

How many of these assholes are there?

[itsnotaonesie]

God, magic is so cool.

[SO COOL.]

Um. Looks like... all of them. You still doing okay? Need a break?

[toiletseat_girl]

It is. But you can't learn it, that's just too much cool for one person.

['cause she says so, so there.

sheeeeeeee. surveys the current condition of her clothes. her hair. her everything else. her everything else is what's really suffering, but she doesn't see any way around that]

I'll not-live. Really.

[and with that, she stabs another mammoth in the throat]

[itsnotaonesie]

Hah! If you could see how many Star Wars Lego sets I had back home, you wouldn't be saying that.

[He is flattered though. But still, he's a massive nerd]

If you're sure. But like. Ew.

[toiletseat_girl]

I take it that the Star Wars Lego sets are a minus to your cool? I dunno about that. Lego sets can be hard, man. And add in Star Wars? That's like a plus or minus to your cool factor. You doing prequels or original trilogy?

[so is she, it's cool]

Be prepared to haul ass a metric fuckton of water for me so I can have a goddamn bath.

[itsnotaonesie]

Little of both, mostly original trilogy. Depending on ho you ask, it either makes me super cool or a big loser. I can deal with either, honestly. And I will haul as much water as you need, you've totally earned it.

[Friendly neighborhood best-housemate-ever-man at your service!]

[toiletseat_girl]

Original trilogy works as long as you swear that Han shot first. Prequels, there's no excuse for. And thank you, I think I have too.

[so much blood. she's going to be able to go as far as the foyer before she has to worry about staining the fuck out of everything. so they'll have to plant the tub in the foyer and everyone who comes in after that point will have to cope with a naked George because FUCK YOU, SHE'S NOT GETTING OUT OF THAT TUB. so there]

[itsnotaonesie]

Han definitely shot first, and George Lucas can bite me. And man, that is going to be a lot of water to heat up.

[That is not a good place for a bath george!!!]