Event Log: Speak Your Truth

[hadrielmods]

Who: Everyone in the city
What: The event log for the Speak Your Truth
Where: All over the city
When: April 3rd-April 9th
Warnings: None

There's a secret burning in your chest. It's hot behind your ribcage, and you need to let it out or else it might consume you- but who would you tell? Who could even begin to understand what you need to say? Your closest friend? Your significant other? Maybe even someone you don't get along with very well? It's hard to know who to trust and who will even understand, but in a strange way, neither of those things seem to matter- all you can think of is what will cause someone the most pain.

Maybe you're trying to get it out in the open so you can put it behind you. Maybe you just need to come clean because the guilt is eating you alive. Maybe you just really want to hurt someone- regardless of the reason, you're aching to tell someone else your darkest secrets.

Will they understand? There's only one way to find out, and it won't be pleasant for either party involved. Good luck, Hadriel!

► This log covers April 3rd-April 9th.
► Please tag headers of threads with content warnings where they apply
► Please put your character's name and open/closed in the subject line of your starters!
► If your secret gets a bit bloody, please let us know here.

Comments

[hot_mes]

[well, the sea was pretty cool. And she's got him on the freedom bit. But he also remembers a peek into her memories earlier, and the details that came with it. He's not trading the New World with its emperors and warlords for the same shit but with different window dressing in a demon realm]

I don't know if I'm interested in eternal life. The past twenty-eight years have been twenty-eight too many as it is.

[abyssalarcana]

[Now that, she hadn't anticipated and she's visibly taken aback as she glances away from the path they're slowly winding through the edge of the forest in order to look up at him with an eyebrow raised.]

That doesn't sound right, not from the little I know. You're really that eager to give up? Why fight the Null at all, then, why not just go climb a tree and jump off?

[She might not have cared much to hear about all of his deep tragedies he's hinted at, but he also seems to have ambitions that a statement like that doesn't really account for.]

[hot_mes]

...that's not what I meant.

[the compulsion pressed on him again and this time he sort of goes with it, even if it won't get what Sorrow wants]

I was supposed to die around age thirteen, if my disease couldn't be cured. Every day after that is basically a day I should never have had. I'm content with whatever life I have, however long it lasts, and when something finally kills me for real, I won't complain or ask for more. I've had more than I deserve already.

[abyssalarcana]

How humble. I hadn't expected you to be humble. Are you certain you're feeling all right?

[Because of course that's what she focuses on, rather than the reminder - and the added detail - that he had lived through some terrible, fatal disease. And as expected for her, too, Sorrow gets nothing. But she's experienced the same issue with others herself. Her tale of poverty and desperation does not elicit much sadness from everyone, particularly when the truth gets in the way, for she had always been callous and talented at murder even in her youth.]

[hot_mes]

[snort!] That's humble? It's realistic. I know I'm living on stolen time.

[but hey, as long as his random admissions and his sarcasm derail her from asking again about joining her, so much the better]

[abyssalarcana]

It isn't realistic at all. Who cares when you were "supposed" to die, you didn't. Now you have all the time you can take. Do something exciting with it instead of being all glum about how it isn't yours.

[Seriously. Is this some hidden part of him that she hadn't discovered before because she never asked? Take it back, Law, she likes the cocky asshole and not the mopey idiot with some sort of strange guilt over a free handout from the multiverse.]

[hot_mes]

[blame Sorrow, even though Law's pretty sure he's not the one who's supposed to feel bad when he spills his guts. Though, he doesn't, really, he's mostly fine. Just a little trepidation in case he says something deserving of murder. He doesn't have time to be dead.]

I am. You just can't see it because we're not anywhere near where I'm having fun.

[abyssalarcana]

Fine, but talking like having a normal human lifespan is some sort of burden isn't very attractive. Or very interesting, compared to the sort of human you seem like you are. But I think I can understand one aspect of it - which is being content to do whatever you like with what you're given, rather than wishing too hard for too much more. Ambition is good, but so is focusing on the here and now.

[Because the truth, always, is that the future is a mystery. Predictions last out to a short while but beyond that, who is to say what might come? And anyone who focuses too hard on that without paying attention to the present will never get there. Seize the day, but really bite down hard when you have it, perhaps.]

[hot_mes]

I'm not trying to be attractive, so whatever. It's no concern of mine one way or the other. I have my plans and I'm moving forward with them.

[abyssalarcana]

See! Now, that's better! The rest of that was nonsense and you must realize it. When you have nothing, the thing to do is to give yourself something. That's all I ever did.

[And it comes welling up again, that feeling, that need to explain herself, and it's very hard to fight it back so she doesn't. None of it will likely bother him and if it does? Oh well. Perhaps it's supposed to.]

[hot_mes]

...and your opinion is that I should give myself eternal life.

[because of the Ope-Ope's perpetual youth surgery factor, Law's instinctive reaction to that concept is complete revulsion. He hides it well but god, that's that bothers him, isn't it? It is.]

[abyssalarcana]

Naturally. Why wouldn't you? There's so much more you could do with the extra time. That's what I figured, anyway. It wasn't my original goal but when I saw what I had, who would turn that down?

[Mortals. Try as she might - and she doesn't often try hard, admittedly - she will never understand them.]

[hot_mes]

I don't want eternal life.

[might as well just go with it, eh? hedging might keep him from being killed but it's also perpetuating the idea that he can be talked into it]

[abyssalarcana]

I know. I don't understand why not, but clearly you seem to think it's not worth the benefits.

[Shrug. Crazy human.]

It isn't like it matters what you want. When you die, your soul will go somewhere, it's not like it just vanishes. But go on, jump in the river and drown yourself instead of getting on a boat, I suppose. Waste of a good soul, but it's better than you going to one of the gods.

[hot_mes]

So you say. But I have no proof that such a thing is how it works in my world. As far as I know all gods are superstition and when you die, that's it. [smoothly, not angrily.] If there is an afterlife, the only one I want is somewhere that Cora-san is. But you can't go back in time and keep him from dying so you can't give me what I want.

[abyssalarcana]

[This is not the first time she's heard vague mention of that person so important to Law, but if she's ever heard any real details she didn't pay attention. Now it feels like an opportunity, though there's not much likelihood of payoff.]

No, but I might be able to work out which part of the afterlife he might have been taken to. Did he worship a god?

[hot_mes]

[it's likely to come out, even if Law doesn't think it's going to help Sorrow any]

No. Like I said, that just isn't something we do in my world. Religious people are pretty rare. I don't think you're going to get anything out of that.

[abyssalarcana]

Fine, tell me about him, then.

[This may not be a truth, it may not be what the gods seem to want this time around exactly, but still she feels that push to inflict some sort of sadness on him. And perhaps she'll also come up with an answer for where his soul might still live on, but most likely not. If he was not a follower of any god, then unless someone caught up his soul for some other purpose, he's wandering the endless soggy wastes at the Anahita's marshy delta, unaware of his surroundings or the passing of a time. Neutral enough until some demon or devil collects the soul to feed on or torture into servitude, respectively.]

[hot_mes]

[oh it'll inflict sadness all right. Law can never think of his dear friend without being a little melancholy]

He was a good man, despite being a pirate and the brother of the worst piece of shit to ever stalk the seas. He tried to stop me from joining them and I stabbed him for it. He saved my life...he stole the Devil Fruit and made me eat it, so I could have the power to cure myself. He gave up his life to make sure that I escaped and survived. I loved him, the only person outside of my own family that I've ever cared about.

[all he expects is that Cora-san is a memory, an inspiration, but not an entity in any world anywhere. Not anymore. That's not how it works.]

[abyssalarcana]

[Ugh, Amamot's butler would have a field day listening to this, while she tries not to visibly recoil. This is why she doesn't ask, normally. He's not even being excessive, it's just that sappiness isn't much fun to listen to. And this person he's describing is so good too which absolutely rubs her the wrong way. Why can't he look up to someone at least a little bit nefarious?]

Selfless, then. Who knows, maybe some god picked him up if they saw something special in him. More likely he's wandering aimlessly, though, like all the faithless. I suppose that means you might still go to the same place, though you won't recognize him. The only way to really try and keep your memories intact is to pledge yourself to someone who will preserve that part of your soul.

[Hint. Hint hint.]

It won't affect anything until after your death, and if it's as meaningless in your world as you claim, then what's the harm?

[hot_mes]

[yyyyyep that's why he never tells her these things]

What does it matter if I keep my memories if he doesn't? Every layer to this tale only sounds more and more like torture, nothing I would want to deal with for eternity - if there's any link between your world and mine. I'm still not convinced.

[abyssalarcana]

You wouldn't want to care for him in the afterlife, as he once did for you? You would throw him away simply because he doesn't remember your face or name?

[She quirks an eyebrow upward, questioning. It occurs to her that perhaps digging was just the right thing - if he takes the bait. He might just get angry. It's gotten hard to care. This place has worn on her too hard, and while everyone else worries about robots, all she wants is to go home to the one person she loves.]

[hot_mes]

[it's working quite well, good job Caedra. He even stops right where he is in the middle of a fern.]

And do even have the chance at that, you would have me serve. I work for no one and I owe no one an obligation. My debts are paid, I won't add to them. [grumblemutter] And if you ever suggest I would throw Cora-san away again we're going to have to pull swords on each other.

[abyssalarcana]

[With the hint of a smirk, she holds her hands up in a gesture of surrender. No, all right, no swords needed - they could tear this jungle apart in pursuit of each other, but this is not the hill she wants to die on, so to speak. Not the thing she would risk their little alliance or whatever it is over.]

We won't need to go that far. But think on it. I can't promise you would see him again, and you know that, but there is a chance, and it's yours to take, if you wish. It all depends on how much you would sacrifice for him.

[hot_mes]

[dammit woman]

That chance only exists if - if - I were to accept the likewise remote chance that anything your describing is real. I still don't believe it. At least, not for someone from another world. If I'm right than any of this is an exercise in futility and I don't have time for it right now.