( log eight | open and closed | your voice, so much i miss you )

[dedikated]

Who: Kate & Anyone but a few people specifically ( Faith, Glacius, Sam )
What: Post-revival / Catchall log for the rest of Oct!
Where: Hope's Temple | The City | The Bar | The Clinic etc.
When: from the 15th onwards!
Warnings: Angst. Death mentions. Lots of yelling. Probably other things.

( starters in the comments! if you wanna wildcard, just start a top level )

Comments

| yesterday and today, so much i miss you. faith. hope's temple.

[dedikated]

Dying, oddly enough, isn't as painful as Kate expects. It's over too quickly to make any real judgement. One minute she's there, charging a dragon to distract it from getting its claws into her friend, and the next-

she's awake, here, in the temple.

It's the revival that hurts, that brings up all the pain and aches of what happened, leaves her bolting upright on Hope's altar and gasping for breath, clutching her chest, the ghosts of injuries that left her on the ground, heart stopped.

She has to blink, get her bearings-

see Faith, immediately.

For a second, Kate isn't sure that she's real.

"Faith?" Her voice is a croak, five days of non-existence worn and throat dry from gasping, from lack of fluid.

[avephoenix]

By the fifth day, Faith has stopped crying, mostly. It's just a persistent sniffling now, and a dull stinging in the back of her eyes that reminds her she's not okay. She's at the usual place, though, sitting on the floor, next to the altar, hugging her legs to her chest and resting her chin on her knees. Staring at the altar does nothing to speed up Kate's revival, but she does it anyway, though now her stare is unfocused. She just-- keeps thinking back to what Hope told her on the network. A few days. It's been longer than that. Why isn't Kate back?

And then--

When did Kate appear? Was it when Faith was blinking? Oh, god, it doesn't matter, she's here. Faith's eyes fill with tears as she gets up, frowning. She all but stomps over, breathing deep as if to yell at Kate, lifting her hands as if she's going to shove her--

But all she does is wrap her arms around her friend in a fierce hug.

"What took you so long!"

[dedikated]

Technically, five qualifies as a few, although maybe several is more accurate. And Kate really isn't sure whether she expected Faith to be waiting or not - in one way, it's Faith, but in another...

well, things were busy. There were dragons.

Her hands stay pressed into the altar, keeping her propped up as she takes the sudden shock of a firebird pressed against her, slowly shifting, uncertain half movements because Kate never, very rarely anyway, knows what to do when people start hugging her.

(They'll get there, eventually. Eventually they find their way to Faith's back, a light touch.)

"Ask-" oh god, her throat. She swallows. "Ask Hope." It's a weak, weary joke, one that's quickly replaced by something much more pertinent.

"It dead?" And, without waiting for the answer; "It hurt anyone?" Did it hurt you, Faith?

| when i look at the evening sunset, so much i miss you. glacius. the city.

[dedikated]

She seeks out Glacius, rather than message him. Finds him in the early morning in the way you find any friend whose patterns you can pick out. They both rise early, do their duties at the crack of dawn.

So, it should be no surprise that she finds him on the way to the clinic, drops down from her rooftop run to catch up to him.

"Hey."

[glacius]

She's right to try to find him en route to the clinic: he's visited there nearly every morning, even after he'd noticed her disappearance. While at first there had been a bit of hope in the ice alien's hearts that he may stop by and see her again, recovered from whatever kept her away and back at work, vibrant and vigorous as he had come to know her... now he was merely dreading the visit. Because there had been a nagging voice in the back of his mind, one that had gone stronger with each day that passed and he didn't see a trace of his friend, didn't so much as even hear from her. This prison-cave was a dangerous place, and it had been even more so lately with the appearance of those massive, winged beasts.

What if something had happened? Something terrible--worse than a sickness or an injury, which would not have kept her away from her work for this long, would not have kept her from even reaching out to him. Even in the worst case scenario, he'd heard that death was not permanent here... but it wasn't something he'd had to ever consider up until now. He was worried--worried sick, even, because operating solo prior to his arrival in this cave meant that he hadn't had to worry about anyone save for in abstract ways, and he wasn't sure what to do with these unfamiliar and very focused feelings.

So when Kate spots him from the rooftop, she'll see that he's dragging his feet much more than his even, measured paces usually allow. She'll see the uncharacteristic slump to his broad shoulders and the way his head is bowed, like he's afraid to look up towards the clinic and see it devoid of his friend's presence once more. That changes when she calls out to him--the alien stops-mid stride and goes completely still, his head snapping up, mandibles flared widely apart and his eyes large as he scans the immediate area.

"Kate," he breathes the recognition of the voice, then it seems to click that she's actually here. "Kate!" He echoes himself more soundly, the relief to his voice audible. He turns to face her and immediately his steps quicken. "Y-you're--you're actually here. Thank the Makers, I was... beginning to become worried that something had happened..!"

wow rude ;;

[dedikated]

She can't miss that gait, the way it lumbers rather than glides even and confident. Her jaw tightens, her throat feels the weight of a lump especially when he begins to speak, lets her figure out that no one told him about her death.

(Why would they? How many people really, truly know how much they mean to each other? It's odd, really, although suited to them. Never really needing things to be public knowledge. There's Emily, but Kate doubts she even knows what happened when the dragons attacked.)

She offers a lazy salute of her hand, a greeting wave, and her lips quirk to one side. A half-smile. She's glad he's okay, too. Everyone seemed to be alive and well, and that-

well, it makes what she did worth it. It must do.

But she can't just let him stay out of the loop. It wouldn't be right to everything that encompasses their friendship so far. So she inhales, squares her shoulders and looks him in those startlingly green eyes. "Dragons were a bit more aggressive than we expected," she begins, "I needed to make sure my friend wasn't hurt. Just got revived yesterday."

| when i watch a good movie i think of you. sam. casa winchester.

[dedikated]

It takes a few hours - sleep, recuperation - for Kate to eventually check her phone. That the network is alight doesn't surprise her

that there are messages for her specifically, however, is something she doesn't expect. Not really, if she thinks about it, when the place has been infested with dragons and probable newbies (it's that time of month, isn't it?) She expects people to be busy, too busy to notice.

But she finds a photo, hears the words - the sounds, perhaps is more accurate - on her phone. There's the sting, the ache of guilt that shoots from chest to skull, the realisation that she didn't even think about anything-

anything but keeping Faith alive.

Her feet lead her there before anything else, before bothering to call or message or even ask where he is.

Sam?

There's a knock on your door, at like 2am.

Better hope no one gets to it before you.

I. HATE YOU. SO MUCH.

[hollowly]

He's been going back and forth, between her place and the temple for the last few days - both in an attempt to keep his mind off of the things that he shouldn't think about and in hopes of actually finding her - and two in the morning is as good a time as any for him to be just as restless, fitful and exhausted if only in body. His mind, for all intents and purposes, has been given a double shot of something that won't let him catch a moment's reprieve.

Not that he would have known what to do with it, anyway.

He'd left her that message in what could have possibly been the lowest moment since it had happened - and while he wouldn't have taken it back even given the chance, he almost wishes he could have said more than what he had. Come back, he'd said. Like there was any real thing she could have done about it. It was a foolish thing, a childish thing, to ask for something that neither of them had any control over.

( Then again ... hadn't he done the very same for Dean? Old habits die hard, don't they? )

The apartment is quiet, the sounds of the city outside fading to little more than background noise when he hears the knock on the door. He's awake, because of course he is, and though he can't deny the way his heart stumbles over itself and lodges in the back of his throat he doesn't want to hope for the best, because it has never gotten him anywhere.

Except for the opposite of where he really wants to be.

His breath is caught when he opens the door, when he sees her on the other side of it, and to say that he's at a loss for words would be like stating the obvious. The sky is blue. Grass is green.

I missed you.

He'll think of something to say. Eventually. Just.

Give him a second.

[dedikated]

Her hair's loose, for once, because it's 2am, because she's not really slept even though she's been exhausted since she came back. Because-

because of a million reasons, but most importantly because she couldn't just leave that message unanswered, could she?

(and they're not really telepathically joined, that was just Confusion, messing with her powers.

... That doesn't mean Kate didn't try, at least for a second, before remembering how her power works.) Her hands are laced together, behind her back because what else can she do other than fiddle endlessly with loose bits of fabric and the ends of undone hair

(We mentioned that it was loose, right? curtaining around her face and ghosting across the top of her hips - because it's been six months - right?)

She's silent, for a moment, because she came here without really planning what she should say.

So, Kate settles for a simple;

"Hi."

| on days where the wind feels good. open. the clinic.

[dedikated]

( of course she's at the clinic the day after.

of course.

and she's back at work, first thing in the morning, the day after.

of course.

rifling through the office, or in the examination rooms (or what passes for them), checking things. making sure everything is still in order (it probably is, let's be honest here) after her disappearance for days.

it's easy to find her, just look for the shock of pink. )

sometime during the week of the 16th!

[liketeenspirit]

[He pushes open the door to the office, kind of quietly.]

Hey. Uh--sorry I didn't come by sooner. There was that whole thing where Confusion made us forget where everything was, and then after that it seemed kinda late, so...

[dedikated]

( she's mid-checking a stack of inventory papers when Ichigo enters, and looks up, eyebrows slightly raised-

had it been that long? people come and go with stuff every so often, sometimes she doesn't keep track, other times she doesn't see them, someone else does; )

-- What's up?

[hippocratical]

[Of course she is. Simon was there the day after he'd been bitten by that infected, the day he was sure he'd die. What else is there to do? Think about what happened, what almost happened, what could have happened? That's hardly even an option. And Simon, well. On seeing her, he hardly even pauses--just a moment to assess her physical condition before he heads into the office proper, leaning in the door frame.]

Everything should be more or less in order. I restocked the rooms as best I could, given our supplies. Unless there's something I missed?

[dedikated]

( she tilts her head and glances up and down the office. the shelves in the supply cabinets seemed alright, neater than they often were. (who knows why that happens Ronan and Adam, we're looking at you.) the paperwork was- well. the paperwork was never very official, more a running tally to keep their heads straight. )

Looks great.

( a fact which makes her life a lot easier, indeed. )

[stepford_smiler]

[Of course Hakkai is here in the clinic. With all of the people from his world gone, he had nothing to do.

Draped on the back of a chair, he finds a yellow coat, which isn't odd in and if itself, but when he picks it up to get a better look at it, he notices initials on it.

KG . He only knew one person with those initials. So he decides to call her up.]

[dedikated]

( after a quick phone call, Kate makes her way to the clinic, scraping her hair back into a ponytail as she walks in. )

Hakkai, you still here?

( of course he is, you took like five minutes you utter muppet. ) What did you find?

wildcard. the bar.

[hasitsthorns]

It'd been, in Rose's mind, a practical inevitability that people would lose their lives in the fight against the dragons. The people here were powerful but they were outnumbered in taking down such mighty creatures. Considering that dragons were akin to gods and world destroyers in Rose's home universe, she hadn't actually expected the people of this place to take them down.

But they did, even if it cost them. It doesn't take long for her to learn that someone died. The community was small so she'd expected it to be someone she was, at the very least, acquainted with. And it was. Kate, she hears. Kate was the fatality. What Rose wasn't expecting was the empathetic pang in her heart at the knowledge.

Dying is, as one might imagine, one of the most unpleasant experiences to go through. At least when you're resurrected. Just dying would be easier since, well, one moment you're there and the next you're not and it's all said and done. You can't feel anything once you're dead so it's kind of taken care of for you. When you come back, however, that's a whole 'nother can of emotional worms to deal with.

Rose is no stranger to those feelings but maybe Kate is and that's what drives her to find the woman - at the bar, which she can't be blamed for at all - and wander on up. Rose is casual and friendly as she just about always is. The blond takes a seat next to Kate at the bar and opens with something easy.

"What are you having?" Small talk is safe. It's a good gauge of how to proceed, if she even should. She wants to, of course, but that's not always up to her.

ayyyy o/

[dedikated]

Dying, itself, was alright. Too quick to really contemplate the pain, to think about what it would be like to disappear into nothing. Reviving sucked, when all the pain of the death she'd avoided by the near-instantaneous nature of it hit her full force.

The fallout, the emotions that Faith poured upon her, the messages on her phone - she's spoken to all of these people, but dealing with them drains the energy from her more than the revival. So she goes back to the one place that's arguably the best in Hadriel:

the bar.

She's halfway through a beer when Rose appears next to her, offers a shrug of her shoulder and a look that's just shy of a smile. (Weird side effect of dying: despite the emotional drainage of everyone else's feelings, Kate herself feels... positive. Like dying shook loose some of the walls, the desire to remain static that fear brought on.)

"Just a beer. You?" small talk is good. God only knows she had enough of the rest for the moment.

[hasitsthorns]

Rose had, unfortunately, had the opposite reaction to her first death that she was resurrected from. Survivor's guilt hit her like an out of control train; the wreck that ensued was devastating for more than just her. She'd been a mess of 'Why me? Why do I get to live and they don't?' and tears that never seemed to end.

The second time she died, it was deserved. There was no coming back and she'd known that. There's still, sometimes, phantom aches in her chest from the shotgun blast. The chill that overtook her body as she drained of blood is something that still haunts her. Then, just when she thought it was over for good, she'd awoken in Hadriel. It re-opened all those old wounds and she's still trying to figure out how to deal with them.

"Something strong, probably. Love a good Long Island. It's like five drinks in one!" she responds with a doofy, lighthearted smile. But it settles into something more placid quick enough and she gets to a more tentative question.

"You doing alright?" 'I heard what happened,' is implied, but... It's up to Kate whether she wants to continue down that path. If not, well, that's totally fine too. Rose is all for shooting the shit in a bar with someone she thinks is pretty cool.

| but i only have you. oc house.

[dedikated]

Whether her lack of presence was noticed by her housemates, or merely dismissed as "Kate's doing something weird again" (probably working too much), Kate doesn't know. All that she does is resume her routine as normal - makes the tea she scored from Hope and has been rationing ever since, stands in the kitchen in the early morning or late at night.

The noise of someone in the upstairs bedroom starts again, hoodies find themselves left thrown artlessly over the living room furniture.

In short, she's back, and easy to catch if you know her routines.

[tongueamok]

One night, as it turns out, the kitchen is already occupied. Carlisle looks up as she walks in, his mug shaking in his hands as he sits at the table -- not because he's seeing a ghost, but because he looks like he's been dead for a while, himself. His hair is a mess, as though he just woke up and didn't bother to brush it; his hands are trembling despite his best attempts to soothe his aches. His eyes look packed for an extended vacation that he'll never get, the bags under them dark and prominent against his pale skin.

But despite his exhausted appearance, he does bother to greet her.

"Shouldn't you be asleep?"

Well... greet her as warmly as he does anyone, at least.

[dedikated]

"Already did," she comments, taking a small mug with a little cartoon elephant from the cabinets, pulling out a container of lavender scented tea alongside it. She's silent until the tea is brewing, leaning against the counter with her arms folded and hair loose, until eventually;

"Have you slept?" It sounds casual enough, as if it's only because of the early hour that she asks that question, not because of his ruined appearance, dishevelled hair, shaking hands. The only thing that gives it away as anything more would likely be the tilt of her head, the hardness in her brown eyes.

| when i hear a good song. sharon. silent hill zone.

[dedikated]

There are certain routines Kate has added to her life, like the one that requires the strapping of weapons to her thigh and the ability to ignore the itch and tension across her body.

Ever since she realised where Sharon's started calling home, Kate's taken to occasionally dropping by the part of Hadriel they created. Sometimes she finds the girl, talks to her, but often she just makes sure nothing seems out of the ordinary. She hops rooftop to rooftop in the zone, navigating it more slowly than she does the rooftops of Hadriel, taking care not to lose her balance in the fog.

She's about halfway into the zone when she drops down, takes the streets instead, glancing through pea soup to see if there's anything out of the ordinary, beyond the monsters and debris.

[unitas]

The fog, and crumbling facade of this reality has been home since the moment she discovered its existence, only hours after reviving all those months back. It stood out, a nail that refused to be hammered down, and she was proud of it. It was a nightmare to live in, but it was her nightmare, and her monsters, and none of it belonged to any of the gods, and somehow that made it better than any house, or apartment.

She kept it to herself as long as she could, hid herself away when she heard people wander in. It stung when Kate first came across her; she felt like a child caught with their hand in the cookie jar, shamed. Then she started to show up more often, sometimes saying nothing at all to her, like she's just checking in.

I can take care of myself, Sharon's told her, This doesn't mean anything, and I like it here. As if any of those words would somehow dissuade her next visit. But they never do. The older woman too stubborn for her own good.

It's no surprise when Sharon spots Kate in the fog, even with the knowledge of the other woman's death. She's the type to put herself in danger, die, and walk right back into the thick of it, no thought of her own safety. Sharon shakes her head as she approaches, offering a three fingered wave,"Shouldn't you be home recovering?"

She may not appreciate seeing Kate in this area, but it's good to know she's alive.

[dedikated]

She's stubborn, yes. But more importantly, she actually likes Sharon and likes spending time with her. And... well, is there really that much more to do here, once work is finished? Go to the bar, get drunk. Spar from time to time. Run the rooftops until you know every single nook and cranny of the restored and unrestored buildings.

After a while, you may as well come down to this old scar of a place. May as well make sure your friends are alright. Find some way to pass the time that isn't running circles like a hamster in a wheel.

"Not much to recover from." Whatever one thinks of Hope, he did well with the restoration of their bodies. She feels pretty much as good as she did before dying. "How've you been?"