hadriel_logs | Event Log: Keepsakes

Entry tags:

Event Log: Keepsakes

Who: Everyone participating in the event!
What: The event log for the Keepsakes event!
Where: All around the city
When: October 15th-October 19th
Warnings: A bunch of random crap.

Well, Hope and Delight are messing with the door again, but at least this time dragons aren't involved, right? This attempt goes a bit better - sure, no one gets sent home, but if everyone will just look under their seats, they'll find a FREE [INSERT SOMETHING YOU MAYBE DIDN'T WANT AT ALL HERE]! Awesome! So nice! Yup, throughout these few days people will be finding things from home - something they loved, something they used all the time, something they hated, something they totally forgot they even had. All sorts of cool stuff!

Well, they might not actually find it. Their neighbor might, or a complete stranger. And who knows where it could turn up? At the park, half-buried? In the Silent Hill zone, kept safe by a horrifying monster? Or hey, maybe in somebody's underwear drawer. Awkward. Better try to find your stuff, or find the owner of whatever weird crap you found. It could be something important.

► This log covers October 15th-October 19th.
► Feel free to make your own logs, as well
► Please tag headers of threads with content warnings where they apply
► Please put your character's name and open/closed in the subject line of your starters!
► If you somehow manage to die in this event, please let us know here, and also what the hell?

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[She twists and stands before he reaches her, holding out a hand for the object.]

If you think it belongs to me you're probably right. [She shrugs. Angels seem to have a sense about these things.]

[ Castiel nodded, and obediently, at the prompting, he handed the knife over, blinking innocently at Jo as he did so. He brought his hands away, slipping them quietly into the pockets of his coat. ]

It belonged to your father.

I- [She's pretty sure she should say something now, a thank you, or some sort of comment, but instead she simply stares at the small blade in her hands, flipping it over and over in disbelief.

It felt the same, had the same worn handle, even the placement of the stamped initials was perfect, but it couldn't be.]

I thought this was destroyed. [She finally gets out the words on her tongue, still holding the knife as if it might dissolve.]

Perhaps it was. The pendant that fell through the door for me--I thought it had been lost.

[ He hummed, softly. ]

The fact that this has come back to you... It's the unspoken nature of things to be drawn together this way, if they have true meaning. It's important to you.

[As she looks down at the knife again she almost feels like crying.

Seeing it again reminds her of the last time there was that familiar weight at her hip, as the dark fought against the edges of her vision and she tried to stay conscious as long as she could...]

It belonged to my dad. I've had it forever. [She runs her fingers along the back of it, smiling softly.]

Thanks, Cas.

It's fine.

[ Castiel hangs back for a moment, considering the knife, considering Jo. After a moment, he says, softly: ]

You still have a great deal of love for your father, even though he's gone. Would you say--even more than you used to have?

Well, [The question makes her pause, and she almost brushes it off, but she knows Cas is both genuinely curious and coming from a good place with the question.]

When you're little your parents are your life. They take care of you and they're there when you fall and break an arm 'cause you weren't listening to them. And when you lose that early, it kind of changes, but you still love them. [She shrugs now, kind of at a loss of how to continue.]

[ Castiel considered the words very deeply, very carefully. The truth was, he'd been in much the same position himself, albeit he'd never met his father. He thought of the archangels briefly, of course, but they had never been so attentive, too busy arguing amongst themselves. Once or twice they'd imparted some wisdom or another, but it was always safer to stay well out of their way.

But his father? Almost like an abstract construct, something he had been born with programmed belief in, and love. His father had left as well, of course, but He had walked away, disgusted with His creations and perhaps even with Himself. Nobody had taken God away from Castiel the way that her father had been snatched away from life before he could watch her grow. It made him think of Dean, and Mary, but then if his father was an abstract concept then the idea of a mother truly was, too distanced from Castiel's world view for him to do much more but long for pity, and the ability to understand. ]

But it's different?

Yeah. [She nods.]

It's kind of always there, but just in the background. Sometimes something will trigger it and there's kind of an ache in your heart, like, you wish they were there but you know it won't happen. But you understand, because they're gone, and you still love them even if they aren't there. [She doesn't know if it even makes sense, but it's a complicated matter. She's never figured out how it works.]

[ Castiel frowned. He lowered his head minutely, thinking of the only loss he'd ever really felt, when Dean had died, lost to the virus that had swept through the city. That was the only time he'd felt a loss like Jo described. But the city had given him back--it had blessed him with that.

He couldn't relate the feeling to his Father. No, he'd only felt betrayed and angered by that loss, nothing else. There was no love lost there. ]

I think I understand.

[ No, he didn't. He hadn't even lived through his grief, how could he understand bittersweet melancholy? ]

It's okay if you don't. [She knows the angel does his best, tries hard to understand, but there are probably somethings he might never understand.

That might be harder for him to deal with in the end.]

How'd you know this was mine anyway?

[ He doesn't realize that she doesn't entirely believe him, but that's okay. The topic is back at hand, either way. ]

For someone to make such an inscription takes time; a psychic bond to an object that is practically tangible. Besides which your father was important, Joanna. As are you.

[ As were you. ]

[She almost just agrees with Cas' assessment of them as important. Her father, after all, was one of the biggest influences of her life.

But then she realizes for Cas to be saying it he means on a far larger scale than just her life.]

What do you mean? Important how?

Important.

[ He looked back at her, and now there was that old intensity. He wouldn't have spoken to her like this some years ago, but this Castiel is more lighthearted about such topics. Intense. Important topics. ]

Cupid struck your parents, just as it did John and Mary Winchester. Your birth was always a part of the plan.

And Cupid only strikes for people who have to do something special.

[Right? Her "birth was part of the plan". That's a little creepy. That she had to be born.]

So I could die?

[ Castiel looked up at her sadly, quietly. ]

I didn't have any knowledge of that. The day that you died... [ He'd come face to face with Lucifer. He paused, just for a moment. ]

Perhaps another angel knew the outcome. What it meant. My kind has a lot to answer for.

[She only meets that sad look for a moment, eventually ducking her head.

That does answer a question she had always had. If Castiel knew, if...]

So you all don't know everything all the time, huh?

[ He wouldn't have walked into a trap, for a start. To think that Lucifer had tried to seduce him to his side...it was ridiculous. But what had happened to Jo and her mother. If he'd known about that, he would have intervened, no doubt about it. ]

No. And whoever told you that is...they were mistaken.

Heaven is not infallible. Far from it.

No one told me that. [She shook her head, sighing quietly.]

It just makes us humans feel better for there to be someone in charge. Mostly. [There's a weak laugh.]

Except when it comes to things like "They had to make sure you were born so you could die and make sure this thing happened", that's not as nice.

It isn't. [ A pause. ] But I wonder it isn't the same for all of us, angels as well. Such is our fate, ultimately, to play our own roles.

[ He lowers his eyes, and it's sad. ] It felt like we were fighting for free will, didn't it? And yet, I wonder if we weren't always supposed to, as though it is only an illusion, even now. How would we know?

[Jo sighs quietly. Free will, huh? Now they were getting into things past her pay grade, kind of. She always had assumed her choices were her own, and then she'd found out how closely she was following in her father's footsteps without even knowing...]

We wouldn't. Right? That's how it works, isn't it?

[ He shook his head minutely. ]

Faith, perhaps? Desperation.

[ The sadness was still there, and it hung on him as he turned away from her. ]

Because if it were free will that caused me to do what I've done since - and free will alone - then I'm not certain I want it. I'm not sure it was ever something worth the fight.

[She sighs quietly, frowning at his back.

Honestly she has no idea what to say.]

I hope it's worth it. For humanity, right?

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Event Log: Keepsakes

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